Podcast #427: Gingers, Death, and Frivolous Encouragement
Drunk Ex-Pastors
Christian Kingery
4.7 • 565 Ratings
🗓️ 6 February 2023
⏱️ 60 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode begins with a serious dilemma with no good solution. We hear from a listener who challenges us about our obsession with death and the end of days (but honestly, doesn't positivity need prior privilege to exist in the first place?). We discuss the issue of female solidarity, and then share biebers involving gathering ammo and, oh yeah, female solidarity.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Okay, here we go. What's up? Hey. Okay, I have something I want to play for you real quick. All right, dude, are we on? Yeah, we're on. All right. So this is a guy, and his whole TikTok is like, would you rather stuff? So like, would you rather do this or would you rather do this? And they're like usually kind of elaborate like things and you |
| 0:21.7 | have to really think about them. I used to play this game with my kids. It was always like who would |
| 0:25.2 | win in a fight? Like salacious crumb from Return of the Jedi or Gleek from the Wonder Twins. |
| 0:31.0 | Right. Okay. So this is this takes a minute but this is worth it. Okay. Would you rather have one of |
| 0:37.2 | your ankles broken every year on |
| 0:39.1 | January 2nd? It's not January 1st so you can celebrate the new year. The method is a broken |
| 0:44.6 | fibula by a 16 ounce anvil black rubber head mallet bought fresh from Home Depot in the morning |
| 0:51.1 | and it's wielded by a male arborist, which is like a lumberjack, |
| 0:55.5 | from Rhode Island. And every year, it's like a random guy that's selected. It's not the same one. |
| 1:01.2 | So the, we're going to call them the lumberjack. The lumberjack hits you in the fibula until |
| 1:05.5 | the bone breaks. In the case that the mallet snaps before the bone breaks, the lumberjack must use the broken pieces of the hammer to break your ankle. |
| 1:15.2 | So like either the head of the mallet or like the broken handle. |
| 1:18.8 | So the stopping point is when the fibula is broken. |
| 1:21.3 | But if there is collateral damage to the other bones or tendons, you must continue until the fibula breaks. |
| 1:27.4 | And the lumberjack watches a skeletal |
| 1:29.7 | anatomy YouTube video before on where the fibula is so he knows where to swing. And let's assume |
| 1:35.1 | it's a semi-decent one like 15 minutes long. As well as that, there is a doctor on duty to check |
| 1:41.5 | whether the fibula is broken after each swing and assume the doctor can tell |
| 1:45.4 | with 100% accuracy. The doctor cannot help or fix you. And each year you pick what ankle you want |
| 1:51.9 | done to, but it's suggested that you alternate by year. And the healing time for broken fibula is |
| 1:57.8 | six weeks to three months, but will slowly increase with age and scar tissue |
| 2:02.2 | development. And this is done in the middle of an open field. And your car is half a mile away |
... |
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