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It's a Wonderful Lie

“Pigeon Eating Trash”

It's a Wonderful Lie

audiochuck

Comedy

4.62.1K Ratings

🗓️ 16 December 2020

⏱️ 25 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

IT’S A WONDERFUL LIE is a 12 part short-form comedy podcast that imagines the hilarious “truth” hidden in your holiday newsletters. Today, Ashley reads Holly & Greg a letter from a woman who has it all (if all you want is to be at the top of a pyramid scheme). Follow our hosts on Instagram: Ashley: @indyashflowers Holly: @hollylaurent Greg: @heygreghesss

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hello there and happy holidays! If you're like me, your mailbox and inbox are beginning

0:08.1

to fill with the obligatory year end updates from family and friends. Exotic vacations,

0:14.5

fulfilling careers, the accomplishments of so many perfect children. Ah, it is the season.

0:21.5

And so we've collected a few Christmas news letters for some festive fun. Names and

0:26.8

locations have been changed, of course, because if there is one thing I've learned in all my years,

0:32.9

it's that there's always room to read between the lines. And chances are, it's a wonderful lie.

0:44.0

Welcome back everyone! Welcome to It's a Wonderful Lie. I'm your host Ashley Flowers joined by

0:51.3

Holly Laurent. Happy holidays! And Greg, I guess! Hey, what's up everybody? So I have another

0:57.9

Christmas letter to break down. I'm gonna spot the lie in this one and I think there might be a few.

1:04.4

Oh perfect. Without spoiling anything, one of my favorite parts of the letter that I have today is

1:11.0

this person lives near someone famous, like may have met them. I don't want to read too much into it,

1:16.5

but it kind of got me thinking have you guys ever met anyone famous? Well, you know, we live

1:21.2

in Los Angeles, so it's never like one of those things that I really enjoy because there's something

1:26.4

about this celebrity thing where they kind of know that people are looking at them and then I like to

1:31.2

pretend like I'm not looking at them, but you kind of are. You get so self-conscious. But the other,

1:35.4

like this happened a few months ago, it was really funny. I was walking in our dog in our neighborhood

1:39.2

and these two women came running up to me holding a small chihuahua and they go, oh my god, I'm sorry,

1:46.0

we've been knocking on all the doors. Do you know whose dog this is? And I said, oh, actually,

1:49.5

yeah, that's my friend's dog, Meatloaf. He lives three houses up. She must have slipped under

1:54.4

the gate and they were like, oh, thank you. And I was like, follow me. I'll walk you over. We'll bring

1:58.0

her back. And as we're walking, I kind of look at the one woman and I was like, oh, hey, I'm Greg.

2:03.8

I live right down there. She goes, oh, hi, I'm rumor. And I was like, rumor. And then the other woman

...

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