Peter Gets DESTROYED By Pensioners! Abbey Exposes His Portugal Tennis Disaster
The Therapy Crouch
Therapy Crouch
4.7 • 3.7K Ratings
🗓️ 19 May 2026
⏱️ 54 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter are still living their best lives in Portugal… although Pete’s ego may have taken a slight battering after a disastrous mixed doubles tennis tournament against a group of senior citizens who absolutely wiped the floor with him. Abbey wastes no time exposing exactly what went wrong, including Pete’s “respectful” approach that spectacularly backfired.
The couple also dive into one of the biggest causes of relationship tension — diary planning. From golf days and family logistics to who really controls the calendar at home, Abbey explains why every single plan now has to go through Claire before marital chaos erupts. Plus, the gang discuss relationship “icks”, going upstairs two at a time, hobbies couples should definitely keep separate, and whether Oasis officially counts as “Dad Rock”.
Elsewhere, Abbey reveals her surprising obsession with David Beckham’s vegetable garden and chickens, Peter reminisces about Oasis nostalgia and Desert Island albums, and the team debate what books and music they’d take if stranded forever. There’s also talk of reality TV habits, holiday advice, and why some things are simply better enjoyed without your partner.
00:00 Portugal Detox & Party Recovery
01:14 Peter Gets Humbled At Tennis
03:00 “Consistency Is Key In Tennis”
04:31 Ross Update & Listener Messages
04:58 Abbey Hates Seeing Pete Lose
05:26 Abbey’s Fear Of Tennis Lessons
06:27 Abbey Opens Up About Childhood & Sport
07:20 Abbey vs Peter: Ultimate Sports Day
08:31 The Couple Argument Everyone Has
10:11 Abbey’s Strict Family Diary System
12:03 Why Busy Couples Always Clash
12:49 The Weirdest Relationship Ick
13:28 Running Up Stairs Debate
15:14 Abbey Reveals Her Biggest Insecurity
15:45 Abbey Discovers A “Normal” Listener
16:26 Abbey’s Celebrity Lookalike Debate
18:05 Couples Sharing Hobbies Goes Wrong
19:14 TV Shows They Refuse To Watch Together
20:37 Hunger Games & Comfort Movies
21:39 The Best Holiday Advice Ever
22:52 Tail’s.com Ad Read
24:28 Desert Island Dilemmas Begin
25:35 The One Book They’d Save Forever
27:31 Roald Dahl & Childhood Reading Memories
28:07 Abbey’s Disturbing Book Confession
30:15 The Secret To Getting Kids Reading
30:55 Desert Island Albums
31:41 Oasis, Nostalgia & Dad Rock Arguments
34:04 Abbey’s Beckham Garden Obsession
35:34 Doomscrolling & “Ignorance Is Bliss”
36:19 Peter’s James Bond Fantasy Life
36:40 Peter’s Visit To Eton
37:49 Inside Eton’s Incredible Traditions
39:15 What Makes Privileged Kids Different?
41:02 The Reality Of Elite Schools
42:40 The Team Debate Luxury & Success
44:18 What They’d Actually Miss On A Desert Island
46:03 Desert Island Guilty Pleasures
47:51 Holiday Packing Essentials
49:20 Things Couples Secretly Judge Each Other For
51:08 Their Most Addictive Habits
52:44 Listener Dilemmas Return
54:33 Final Portugal Reflections
56:17 End
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | And I'll just come on like a seal. |
| 0:03.2 | What if he came to bed tonight and did that in bed? |
| 0:06.2 | Be a half to in bed. |
| 0:07.5 | I was to try it. |
| 0:08.2 | No, thanks. |
| 0:09.6 | No, thank you. |
| 0:10.9 | I can't believe you're lying to our listeners. |
| 0:12.8 | Imagine stalking the Beckham's Instagram. |
| 0:15.4 | You're not stalking and red onions and the sun's chew. |
| 0:20.3 | I'm very interested in his chickens. Oh, obligado. Hello and welcome to the Therobie Crouch with me, Abby Clancy. Me Peter Crouch. And me, Gaz. How are you guys? Good. How are you? I'm very good. I missed you. How the devil have you been? Good. So much. Good. I know. I can sense that you're ready to party. But we are on a detox. Yeah. That was the first thing I asked this morning. I was like, what times are there? We're doing like no drink. Health is well just just from the weekend |
| 0:54.8 | yeah |
| 0:55.5 | yeah we've decided that |
| 0:56.5 | on the Monday |
| 0:57.0 | after the weekend |
| 0:58.8 | was it a lively one |
| 0:59.9 | yeah we're quite a lively one |
| 1:01.3 | but like just you know |
| 1:02.3 | we had a bit of fun |
| 1:03.9 | then we had a tennis tournament |
| 1:05.6 | then we had a |
| 1:08.5 | few drinks after us to celebrate, really. |
| 1:11.3 | I've heard about this tennis tournament. |
... |
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