Patrick O’Malley: Getting Grief Right

Sounds True: Insights at the Edge

Tami Simon

Religion, Religion & Spirituality

4.6 • 1.8K Ratings

🗓️ 20 June 2017

⏱️ 60 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Patrick O'Malley is a grief counselor with more than 35 years of experience. He has written many well-regarded articles on grieving, including the namesake New York Times article that inspired his new Sounds True book Getting Grief Right: Finding Your Story of Love in the Sorrow of Loss. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Patrick discuss his unique approach to grief and how it diverts from the popularly accepted five-stage model created by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross. Patrick asserts that the Kübler-Ross model, while helpful as a foundation, can actually create an emotional cage for people as they struggle to find the acceptance and closure that they expect to end their grieving. Tami and Patrick also talk about the odd way in which the concept "closure" became entwined with grief therapy and why sharing our stories of loss can be the most important step in the process. Finally, Patrick shares his own story of loss and explains that the simple act of being compassionately heard can be the most important step toward healing. (60 minutes)

Transcript

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0:00.0	This program is brought to you by sounds true.com.
0:04.0	At sounds true.com you can find hundreds of downloadable audio
0:08.0	learning programs, plus books, music, videos, and online courses, and events.
0:14.3	At sounds true.com, we think of ourselves
0:17.2	as a trusted partner on the spiritual journey,
0:20.2	offering diverse, in-depth, and life-changing wisdom.
0:24.0	Sounds True.com, many voices, one journey. You're listening to Insights at the Edge. Today my guest is Patrick O'Malley.
0:45.0	Patrick O'Malley has been providing grief counseling and education to clients, volunteers, and
0:50.4	colleagues for over 35 years. He's also served as a consultant to physicians,
0:56.8	attorneys, and businesses and has written numerous articles on grief and other
1:02.2	mental health topics for many popular and
1:04.9	professional publications. What sounds true, Patrick O'Malley is the author of the new book
1:11.1	Getting Grief Right,
1:13.8	Finding Your Story of Love
1:16.3	and The Sorrow of Loss.
1:18.8	In this episode of Insights at the Edge,
1:21.2	Patrick and I spoke about how there's no one path to grief and how Elizabeth
1:26.8	Kubler Ross's five-step model leading to a mythic type of closure and completion has actually created a cage for many people
1:37.0	in which they feel ashamed about how they're grieving and how long it's taking.
1:42.0	We talked about the myth of closure, our culture's
1:46.2	imbalanced emphasis on positivity, and also a new framework for grieving that's based on telling and listening to our shared
1:57.8	stories of loss.
	...

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