Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm bailiff, Jesse Thorne. This week,

pain and suffering. Lisa brings the case against her brother David. Lisa and David work together

at their family's law firm. David sets an alarm on his phone for every task he has to complete.

His phone alarm clock goes off at least 10 times a day, not counting the alarm he uses to wake up in the morning.

Lisa hates the alarms. They're too disruptive.

She wants him to write out a to-do list instead.

But David says his system is already perfect.

Who's right, who's wrong, only one can decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.

Oh, I have been out searching with the black book in my hand, and I've looked between the lines on the pages that I've read, and I met the walking dude religious. His worn down cowboy boots, he walked like no man on earth, and I swear he had no name.

Bail of Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigant sin.

Lisa and David, please raise your right hands.

Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?

So help you, God, or whatever?

I do.

I do.

Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite the fact that I've never seen him alarmed other than maybe once or twice when we weren't three hours early to the airport?

I do.

I also do.

Judge Hodgman, you may proceed.

Lisa, David, you may be seated for an immediate summary judgment in one of your favors.

Can either of you name the piece of culture that I referenced as I entered this courtroom?

Oh, Lisa, why don't we start with you? Oh, wait a minute, Lisa. I got to get a pencil and some paper

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