Overcoming Bad Communication and Strife in Marriage | Stand for Your Marriage Challenge - Day 4
Established Family Podcast
Derek Palizay
5.0 • 585 Ratings
🗓️ 10 April 2026
⏱️ 48 minutes
🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS
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Summary
Strife is more than poor communication. It is a spiritual assignment to dismantle covenant.Day 4 of the Stand for Your Marriage Challenge is focused on upright communication. Many spouses think they only have a communication problem, but underneath contention, accusation, and constant tension there is often a deeper spiritual disorder attacking peace in the home.Godly communication protects covenant.Strife works to tear it down.In today’s teaching, we address patterns of contention and help you begin uprooting what has been normalizing disorder in your marriage.Today’s challenge will help you:— identify patterns of strife and contention— uproot destructive communication habits— understand the spiritual weight of conflict— pursue the peace of God in your home— stand in greater order and uprightness
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | What is going on everybody? Derek Pousa here with my wife Jordan. Again, welcome to day four of the challenge. You're just now crossing over the halfway point. Seven days is a long time, especially when you're doing 30 to 40 minute videos, but we didn't create this with the intention that it would be quick and easy. |
| 0:22.6 | We created it with the intention that if you go through this, that this is the last time you have to |
| 0:28.3 | have a standing season because you did it to completion. You sought the kingdom. You responded |
| 0:34.7 | and yielded to. You were willing and reasoning to listen to the Holy Spirit |
| 0:40.4 | in what he was trying to impart into this season. So therefore, he didn't have to switch the |
| 0:45.4 | teacher on you. He didn't have to switch the environment. He didn't have to give you three or |
| 0:48.8 | four more things that paused you in your tracks to get attention of your spirit because your |
| 0:53.9 | flesh was out of the way |
| 0:55.1 | he was working on your soul and he was restoring the spirit man so i want to start today's session |
| 1:00.5 | by saying if you and your spouse it's not because of the separation it's not because of the kids |
| 1:06.5 | it's not because of the finances it's not because you're in a season of hardship. If you and your spouse |
| 1:11.1 | are always arguing, it's not just a communication problem. That is the premise of today. So the title of |
| 1:18.0 | today is stand in upright communication. This should be the heart of a son and a daughter, |
| 1:23.7 | regardless of the outcome of what happens to the marriage in this season, I will stand |
| 1:28.4 | an upright communication. So if you and your spouse are always arguing, it's not just communication |
| 1:34.4 | problems. You are dealing my friend with a spirit of strife and a spirit of contention. |
| 1:40.7 | It has mentioned hundreds of times in New Testament scripture, right? But many of you were |
| 1:46.0 | raised in environments just like my wife and I to our own regard and our own experience where |
| 1:51.7 | strife was normal, where contention was the entire atmosphere. It was silence. It was avoidance. |
| 1:59.2 | It was yelling. It was passive aggressiveness. It was verbal dominance. It was |
| 2:03.9 | fractionalized. You were raised by double-minded people who could flip-flop between all of those |
| 2:09.0 | things and you never knew what you were going to get. So you went into a system and a government |
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