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Good Morning, Sodomites!

"OUTSOURCE THE DICK" with BRITTANY SCHMITT

Good Morning, Sodomites!

Zach Noe Towers

Comedy

4.9535 Ratings

🗓️ 11 June 2021

⏱️ 67 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

You may know Brittany Schmitt from her podcast "Fuck, Marry, Chill" but did you know she used to sport-fuck pro athletes?!?


Follow Brittany on IG: @BrittanySchmitt


Get tickets to her special taping in Austin, TX: https://www.brittanyschmitt.com/

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.7

Hello, Tower bottoms. It's me, your host, Zach Newee Towers, and this is a podcast about sex.

0:07.2

It has been a whirlwind week. I don't even know where we left off in my journey. But in the past like two weeks, I was given two month notice for my job. I did not get the dog that I was

0:23.6

trying to adopt. What else big? Oh, I opened for Chelsea Lynn or Tammy. You might know it

0:33.4

from social media, which is a blast. I started fostering a puppy that is like a Chihuahua

0:38.7

terrier mix. Um, and immediate follow up to that, I adopted him a few days ago. And his name is

0:47.6

Peanut. A Peanut Noey Towers. Um, he will have an Instagram. I am already obsessed with him.

0:53.7

I would take a bullet for him, I think. Uh, he's truly one of. I am already obsessed with him. I would take a bullet form, I think.

0:55.6

Uh, he's truly one of the cutest, uh, creatures walking the earth.

1:01.8

Um, I guess I caught you guys up really fast.

1:06.3

Um, other than that, I'm trying to think of like the checklist I do in my head.

1:09.8

Mental health is great.

1:13.7

Pocketbook, solid.

1:15.8

Roommate is awesome.

1:17.1

I hope you enjoyed last week's episode with my Roommie.

1:19.8

He's a sweetheart.

1:22.2

And he's definitely listening to this.

1:23.5

So hi, Garrett.

1:33.7

Yeah. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I also headlined my first club last week. And it was clunky but fun, much like many first times. I have notes for myself. I probably could have

1:43.2

prepared more. It's just hard in L.A. to do

1:46.3

extended periods of time on stage because we all get like six to 12 minutes on average.

1:51.6

And it's just hard to build an hour that way. Like I have eight years, you know, of like

1:55.0

butthole jokes. But it's like, do you do all the butthole jokes at once? Do you separate

...

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