A

Hello everybody, it's me.

Jackie Shimmel, hyphen, mother fucking haze.

There is no hyphen.

There's no hyphen and to be totally honest, my name is still Jackie Shimmel because I would

rather go to an ISIS prison camp than go to the DMV.

The lighting is bad, the people are bad, it's slow.

Honestly, every fucking government run organization is the slowest, archaic, most inefficient way

of handling shit.

I've been waiting on a pair of loafers for two weeks that were supposed to be delivered

in two days.

I'm talking to you, USPS, I am pissed.

Yeah, so I'm not going to the DMV, so it's just little old Jackie Shimmel here.

And wow, we have so much to catch up on.

Last week, Andrew and I went to Santa Barbara County, wine country.

Is it technically wine country?

It's like central coast.

We stayed at the beautiful, beautiful, beautiful Santa Yinez Inn if you live in Southern California

or even if you don't, you have to go stay there.

I didn't know what I was getting myself into.

I felt like fucking Marie and Tuenette.

The ceilings are like 35 feet high.

...