No Excuses/ You Don't Have to Kill Yourself Anymore

The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project

All Things Comedy

Comedy, Sports, Arts

4.8 • 4.6K Ratings

🗓️ 9 January 2019

⏱️ 45 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Clemson destroys Alabama in the national title game, Cody Parkey misses THE kick sending the Chicago Bears packing, and Derrick Rose apologizes for telling people to kill themselves.
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Transcript

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0:00.0	You're listening to Comedy Central.
0:02.6	Welcome to episode 16 of The Jettelmanck and Rosenthal Vanity Project, Jeremy Payne.
0:07.9	Junior Vice President.
0:09.7	The longest three weeks of your lives are over.
0:14.1	Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day.
0:16.5	Eat a man and you can fish for the rest of your life.
0:19.7	Easy Street.
0:30.0	We're back.
0:31.0	The weight is over.
0:33.0	I know it's been tough for all the jettel-nickers out there.
0:38.1	I don't know.
0:39.1	That's too close to a Rachel Slurr.
0:40.1	I can't say.
0:41.1	Wow.
0:42.1	It's never been something cool.
0:45.0	We need a name for people that listen to this show.
0:48.8	Junior Vice President, I guess, work.
0:51.1	Sure.
0:52.1	I mean, it's better than the first thing you said, for sure, that you put no thought into
0:56.4	and then just thought you could get away with.
0:58.3	Yeah, we've been off for the last two weeks.
1:01.0	I had rescheduled things.
	...

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