Never Trust A Fart

Bloodline Banter

2M Media Group

Society & Culture, Comedy

5.0 • 657 Ratings

🗓️ 5 February 2026

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Welcome back to Bloodline Banter, where Landon and Riley once again prove that no topic is too dumb, too loud, or too uncomfortable to spiral into for 40 minutes straight. In this episode, the cousins recount the high of hitting top 15 on the podcast charts (yes, above Khloé Kardashian), but their week wasn't all sunshine and rainbows though as the two trekked outside into Nashville's winter snow-pocolypse as self-proclaimed meteorologists. Thank God for this podcast.... they clearly needed a hobby. From swamp ass debates to a Walmart security incident, this episode somehow manages to cover it all. Although, we can't promise you will walk away an academic or with a better understanding of the law. Speaking of which, the amount of Doritos in a standard bag is criminal. That we know for certain. Oh, and champagne tastes like static electricity. Make sure you stick around for a deeply unqualified but wildly confident advice segment known as Cousin Counsel. Submit all stories, questions, and shenanigans to be featured on Cousin Counsel to bloodlinebanter@thecastcollective.com If you’re here for structure, this ain’t it. If you’re here to laugh, feel slightly better about your own life choices, and hear two cousins say the things everyone else is thinking but won’t admit out loud, welcome to the family. LETS GET SOCIAL: Bloodline Banter: Instagram - (https://www.instagram.com/bloodlinebanterofficial/) Tiktok - (https://www.tiktok.com/@bloodlinebanterofficial/) Snapchat - (https://www.snapchat.com/@bloodlinebanter) Email - (bloodlinebanter@thecastcollective.com) Landon Mauk: Snapchat - (https://www.snapchat.com/@landonmauk) Instagram - (https://www.instagram.com/itslandonmauk/) Tiktok - (https://www.tiktok.com/@landon.mauk) Facebook - (https://www.facebook.com/landonmauk/) Riley Mitchell: Snapchat - (https://www.snapchat.com/@rileygmitchell3) Instagram - (https://www.instagram.com/realrileymitchell/) Tiktok - (https://www.tiktok.com/@rileygmitchell) Facebook - (https://www.facebook.com/share/16uoUitXm8/?mibextid=wwXIfr) Produced and Edited by: The Cast Collective (Nashville, TN) Visit us today at https://www.thecastcollective.com Email: info@thecastcollective.com YouTube – (‪@TheCastCollective‬) Instagram – (https://www.instagram.com/TheCastCollective) TikTok – (https://www.tiktok.com/@castcollective) Directed by: Erin Dugan Edited By: Michaela Dolph, Toby Friedman, Corey Williams, & Sean Dugan

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hello.
0:02.0	Get a wife from it.
0:07.0	I didn't do anything.
0:08.0	I think of you stupid.
0:10.0	You're stupid.
0:15.0	I'll even love a shit, but I need no damn tuna fish on bread.
0:18.0	Hello everybody.
0:20.0	Welcome back to Bloodline Banter. I'm Landon. And I'm Riley. And here we are. Thank you so much for tuning into the first episode. We were shown so much love. We can't even believe it. It's literally insane. It's been crazy. We are so thankful. And we just hope that you get a good laugh and can forget about all the shit going on in the world.
0:40.1	Yeah.
0:40.3	And we also charted.
0:42.3	They charted us.
0:43.6	I think we're sitting 13 right now.
0:45.4	13 in our category and 130 in the world.
0:48.8	Which might I add is above Chloe Cornassian.
0:52.0	Don't.
0:52.9	Listen, if you're from our hometown, you don't know what that means.
0:55.9	It's basically the opposite of being posted in the busted paper.
1:00.8	Yeah.
1:01.6	So, I mean, do with that information as you will.
1:04.0	So anyways, so we've been, if you're watching this with power right now, iconic for you.
1:09.6	Yeah.
1:10.2	Because we've had a, we've had an ice storm in
	...

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