Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burr and it's the Monday morning podcast from Monday, July 1st, 2013.

Oh my God, is it July already? I feel like the summer is going by and I haven't even put on a strapless yet.

Oh, have another fucking... Have another vodka and fucking something stupid drink.

All right. Now, why are all the wires tangled up?

Christ, this is no way to start a podcast.

What's going on? Oh, Jesus fucking Christ. Isn't this amazing just how fucking tangled up some shit can get?

You know, how does snakes do it? Just going around. They're basically like a fucking mic wire, aren't they? They could kill you.

Some of them. Sorry, I'm just gonna undo this fucking. Is this any way to start a podcast?

Is it putting a fucking windscreen back on it? I use a windscreen inside.

All right. So if you're new to my podcast, that's the level of intelligence that you're gonna be dealing with.

Do you think is a snake, right? If you're not poisonous,

this got to be like sucking its sports, you know, for a human being and you go into gym class.

What exactly do you do if you're a non-poisonous snake? I mean, you can't fucking grab anybody

because you ain't got no abs. What do you do? How does a gardener's,

gardener's snake? There's a gardener. Oh, Jesus. How the fuck does a non-poisonous snake eat?

It just has to eat shit alive. Just, you know,

shit that isn't tougher than it and it's just got to lash out at it. Just,

is the fucking thing squirming around? God, what a life. You know, and I tell you,

you got to commend the gardener or gardener or gardener. James Garner's snake,

you really have to commend them for the, for their attitudes, like you meet them,

they're not really bad people. You know what I think I'm gonna do? I think I'm gonna write a thank you

letter and I'm gonna put it in the fucking gardener's snake, gardener's snake, whatever the fuck it is,

...