4.8 • 32.8K Ratings
🗓️ 23 June 2014
⏱️ 96 minutes
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0:00.0 | Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrne. It's the Monday morning podcast from Monday, June 23rd, |
0:08.4 | 2014. How's it going? How are you? What's up and all of that shit? |
0:17.5 | I don't know. What do I start? I don't even know where to begin. |
0:22.4 | I take my special Friday night in Atlanta at the tabernacle and I want to thank everybody who came out. |
0:28.0 | I had a wonderful time. As always, there were a couple of glitches. As always, a couple people screamed out. |
0:34.2 | And as always, what the fuck are you going to do? I had a great time and I'm really looking forward to putting that special out and coming up with my new hour of material. |
0:44.6 | And right now, I'm trying not to freak out because essentially, when this thing comes out in a couple months, I have no, I mean, I have an act, but it will be an act that potentially people in the crowd have seen. |
0:55.9 | So I have to try some, I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do. You know what I do when I try to build a new hour. No, Bill, we don't know. Nor do we give a shit. Well, fuck you. It's my podcast. I'm going to talk about it. |
1:09.1 | What I like to do basically, I basically, I take off all rules of like hackneyed shit. I don't give a fuck. I will talk about anything. |
1:19.3 | So I am now just looking what's going, what's going on in the news? It's a little interesting thing. It's like Jay Leno's bit, right? |
1:29.3 | When it takes like the headlines, except he actually has a staff of writers coming through to actually find funny ones. |
1:38.3 | I, on the other hand, will be going down to the clubs, just throwing anything I can up against the wall. Why the fuck is it so hot in here? |
1:45.3 | Jesus Christ. And I can't open the fucking windows because my neighbors are going to freak out. I'm taping this Sunday night so everybody's home right now. God damn it. |
1:58.3 | Jesus, it's not one fucking thing. It's not you know what I was going to do it in the bedroom. You know, but my wife wants to go take a bath and relax. |
2:05.3 | What's you know, is that wrong? No, it's not wrong. You know, is it is it is it pathetic that I can't do a podcast in the in the next room without disturbing her because I scream and yell and rant and rave and all that shit. I guess that is pathetic. |
2:21.3 | So I am, I'm out here in the living room. I can't open the fucking windows and I tell you that he's getting to me already. Oh, it's getting to me. |
2:31.3 | What would you rather do? Would you rather freeze to death? I'll give myself a dilemma here. Would you rather freeze to death or I'm not going to say burned to death. Everybody's going to choose. |
2:40.3 | Freeze into death. Although there'll be a couple of dooshes. Well, both of them are going to be painful. So I'd rather get the pain over with. |
2:49.3 | You know, hit me with some sort of scientific facts or whatever. He'll just say some science shit. They don't even have to be facts when it comes to my scientific background of which I have none. |
3:01.3 | You know, I took two goddamn classes. No, I didn't even do that. One was chemistry and I was just like, I'm not fucking looking at bugs. You know. |
3:14.3 | I know it's not bugs, but I had to follow through with that sentence because that's the first thing I thought of when I was looking looking in the Petri dish. What are you looking at? |
3:24.3 | Oh, that's biology. So I was still wrong. Chemistry. You know what I love about this fucking podcast is how dumb you guys think I am. Not how dumb you think I am, but like how much smarter? Like the shit that you guys write. I swear to God. |
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