Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Burn, it's the Monday morning podcast for Monday. May 30th, 2011. Happy Memorial Day!

Happy Memorial Day! You should be out at a parade for the truce, but you're just sleeping off a hangover.

Cause you are a fucking selfish cunt. You wave hello to the troupes at the airport. But when they give them a day and you're supposed to be out there, you're laying in your fucking bed, you douche.

Hey, what's going on? I'm in my bed too. I notice you have braces. I have braces too.

What's that line from? Hi, everybody. The beep was some butt head movie. Oh boy, oh boy, who took Tylenol PM last night? I did. I roofied myself, everybody.

You ever just really, really, really fucking tired? Fucking tired, Joe. Dude, I slept like a fucking stone kid.

I was really tired last night. I was nodding off. I was on my couch and what the fuck was I doing? I was dealing with my dog who's afraid of the wind.

He's like the wind. Am I going to sing this whole fucking podcast? My dog does not like wind. It freaks the fucking thing out and it eats its way out of its cage.

I call it the cage. The dog trainer calls it the Casa, which is Spanish for the cage. No, it is it. I took two years of Spanish old TV play and Casa means house.

So what are you suggesting? It's not a cage. Cage implies that it's something negative and you don't want to have a shut up. You useless cunt.

All right, go trim your fucking beaver and stay out of my head. All right, it's a fucking cage. The dog is in a queue breaks out of a house.

You know, you break into a house. Oh my god, it's so awesome. I have to get in there and see what kind of stuff they have. You break into a house, but when you break out of a structure, that's not a home.

Okay, when you don't give a fuck that your gums are bleeding and you're scraping the chest hair off of your torso so you can squeeze through a fucking porthole that your fat ass body can't fit through. That's not a house.

That's not a Casa. That's not limer. So whatever the fuck it is in French.

I can't think of it. Didn't it be with a CH? What is French for house? Shapo was a fucking hatch.

Was a shirt. Moschermy. A Jean. No, my mother's a fuck yourself. I flunked. You know something. I actually took French one past that then was, but was too dumb to go on to French to.

So they actually had French to a the triple a of fucking French part. And I flunked so bad. I flunked that class so badly. My dad made me go back to French one to get the basics. And I then went back and flunk that.

God Jesus Christ. Still a little sick here people. If you wonder why I'm a comedian that little that little story I just gave you right there then I'll let you know right there. Then I'll let you know, you know the fact that I could go back in time and do worse than I did the first time.

You know, do you guys ever see back to the future when Marty McFly goes back? You know, and he just starts writing all the wrongs. And when he comes back to the future he's got a Toyota for Rada.

Right. And everything worked out and you got the girl of his dreams. I did that real life. I went back in time. I went back to French one and I actually ended up doing worse. So because of that I never liked that trilogy.

Everyone else was just going along for the ride. And I was sitting there going to do that fucking bullshit. All right. He'd go back in time and he would do even fucking worse.

All right. Let's move on here. This is the money money podcast everybody. For those of you who enjoy the sound of my voice and feel like you can't get enough of it. Just in case you missed it last week. I actually was on the Adam Corolla podcast.

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