Monday 4.13.26

Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Audacy

Comedy

4.9 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 13 April 2026

⏱️ 115 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Don’t use your divorce attorney as a therapist. Lazlo wants the doctors to push him in the water, and could probably make the High School JV Golf Team if he tried. SlimFast LOVES it when fireworks go wrong. CVS should round DOWN for sick children. A man set a lady on fire, and there's a bill trying to get kids off social media. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

Transcript

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0:00.0	The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.
0:10.0	Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness.
0:17.0	For he is truly his brother's keeper and finder of lost children.
0:22.6	And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger,
0:29.6	those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers.
0:33.6	And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon me.
0:41.7	Ladies and gentlemen, the Church of Laslow has begun.
0:47.5	Yo!
0:48.7	How are you, man?
0:49.5	I'm fantastic.
0:50.7	How are you?
0:51.0	I'm great.
0:51.8	Yeah?
0:52.2	No problems.
0:53.0	How was your weekend?
0:54.1	Oh, that was fine. Yeah? That was fine. Yeah? Yeah. Nothing exciting? Just like stuff that we had to do. Some of it, you know, was fun stuff. So, like, it was my sister-in-law's birthday, so we went out to lunch with her yesterday.
1:12.4	What's sister-in-law?
1:18.4	The one that lives here, the one that you went to the lake with, and that you've made an offer to.
1:20.5	You know, I always think about that.
1:23.6	Whenever you say sister-law, I never think about her.
1:24.5	Oh, really?
1:26.8	I always think it's got to be like, you know, your brother's sister.
	...

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