Monday, 1.5.26

Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Audacy

Comedy

4.9 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 5 January 2026

⏱️ 128 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

It feels weird to be off Holiday break, and saying ‘Girlfriend’ is cringe. Lazlo gives a long awaited back update, and wants to run Venezuela. People say Lazlo’s either too fat or too skinny, and the guys are fascinated with federal holidays. There's no Overland Park in Italy. It’s a GREAT time for betting, and what's going to happen to Travis Kelce? In Headlines, Will Smith is getting sued for sexual harassment (and is a cuck), the US took Venezuelas’ president, Slim is excited for the McRib Lawsuit, and much much more! Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

Transcript

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0:00.0	The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.
0:11.2	Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness.
0:17.9	For he is truly his brother's keeper and finder of lost children.
0:23.5	And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger, those who attempt
0:31.0	to poison and destroy my brothers.
0:34.5	And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon me.
0:41.8	Ladies and gentlemen, the Church of Laslow has begun.
0:47.7	Yo!
0:48.8	What's up, my man?
0:49.9	Well, we are here live.
0:51.9	Yeah.
0:52.3	I don't know what's been going on here.
0:53.4	They've been playing Best of, or? I don't know. I can't imagine they have that much. Yeah. I don't know what's been going on here. They've been playing Best of or?
0:55.2	I don't know.
0:56.0	I can't imagine they have that much.
0:57.4	No, I don't know what they were doing.
0:58.5	A long time.
1:00.0	I was here a couple times.
1:01.5	I saw her boss, but I didn't check in or anything.
1:05.6	So, yeah.
1:06.5	I'm just trying to remember how to push the buttons and all.
1:08.5	You got it, right? We're good. Yeah. But, you know, we'll get back in the swing of things.
	...

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