Men's Work Session - When Childhood Trauma Impacts A Marriage

ManTalks Podcast

Connor Beaton

Relationships, Mental Health, Education, Society & Culture, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.8 • 591 Ratings

🗓️ 26 August 2024

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Talking points: attachment, avoidance, divorce My anonymous guest this week has been solving the puzzle of his anxious attachment style for a while now. He’s made great progress, but there’s more to be done. On top of this, while it’s impacted all of his romantic relationships with intense conflict, distance, and damage, his wife is an avoidant. It’s a complicated situation, but there IS a way forward. (00:00:00) - What brought our guest in today (00:05:58) - Why my guest is holding onto something they’ve identified as unhealthy (00:12:11) - What my guest is hoping to get out of the session, and a hard truth (00:16:53) - Taking on responsibility and shame when things aren’t working in the world (00:21:37) - When a young child can’t get the attention it needs, it’ll be encoded as panic to the child (00:31:33) - The declaration *** Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	All right, my anonymous friend, how you doing today?
0:10.3	I'm excited and doing fairly well in the moment.
0:13.7	Good, good, good, good.
0:15.6	Well, tell me a little bit about why you're here today, what you're hoping to work on,
0:22.7	and maybe what would be ideal in terms of what you'd like to get out of our session today. Yeah. Summised version is I'm
0:29.6	facing probably the hardest or most difficult time in my life with just not only working through
0:35.5	kind of discovering some things from my childhood and wounds
0:38.4	and trauma that I've been there that I've worked through years in therapy and they're kind of
0:42.4	just all just coming together with like culmination of like they're ready to heal and everything
0:47.7	else in my life is pointing at that and also dealing with some big challenges in my marriage
0:53.4	and potential divorce and kind of putting the know, big challenges in my marriage and potential divorce
0:54.5	and kind of putting the pieces together of stuff in my childhood and relationship with my parents
0:59.3	and how that's impacting all of my romantic relationships, especially with my wife right now
1:04.3	and really want to heal for some things that are causing conflict and causing, you know, avoiding or keeping me from a
1:11.9	healthy relationship.
1:13.1	Got it.
1:13.5	Okay.
1:14.4	And the separation with your wife was that you initiated, her initiated, like tell me a
1:20.3	little bit about how that came about.
1:22.2	Yeah.
1:23.5	For about two, one and out to two years, there was talk on and off about living separately
1:29.3	because of some intense conflict, and we were in therapy actually with a couple of therapists
	...

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