Mark Normand Is A Gay Dad | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

2 Bears 1 Cave

Society & Culture, Comedy

4.8 • 23.2K Ratings

🗓️ 9 June 2025

⏱️ 67 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

SPONSORS: - Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/BEARS ! #trueclassicpod - Head to https://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to get started. - Get started at https://factormeals.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50 percent off plus FREE shipping on your first box. This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura is joined by the hilariously unfiltered Mark Normand! The episode kicks off with farts and sharts as Mark shares the horrifying tale of sharting on a date right after letting one rip at the top of the show. The Bears talk about parenthood, including Mark's brand-new baby, Tom's kids telling gay jokes, the absolute chaos of tiny humans mimicking adult behavior, and the innocence of youth. They next dive into Tom Cruise’s intensity, his popcorn-eating habits, and whether the man who saved cinema is also just a little…off. Then they go deep on comedy life: struggling in New York, open mics, internet haters, and the brutal truth that even legends get roasted. Mark also shares more about life as a Brooklyn dad, falling asleep to podcasts, his time as a janitor, and a wild Copenhagen strip club story courtesy of Bert Kreischer. The conversation also hits on Tim Dillon's CNN moment, Sam Morril, Joe List, Vyvanse brain boosts, and weird dudes trying to get into business with Tom’s old corn star neighbor. Buckle up, queef it up, and enjoy! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 292 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:35 - Sharts & Babies 00:05:08 - Tom Cruise 00:13:42 - Dad Stuff 00:20:12 - COMEDY! 00:27:22 - Hate From The Internet 00:33:42 - New York Comedy Scene 00:38:46 - Gay For Bert 00:44:41 - Conquering New York 00:51:03 - Right Man For The Job 01:00:10 - Texas 01:03:34 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	100%
0:01.2	Well, bird is having 16 feet of intestines removed this week.
0:10.6	We wish him well in his recovery and sitting in for him.
0:15.4	He's gay.
0:17.0	He's Muslim.
0:18.3	He's hilarious.
0:19.6	Give it up for Mark Norman everybody
0:21.7	There you go
0:23.8	Thanks for coming in
0:25.5	Good to be here, gonna be back Tom
0:27.3	Thanks for having me
0:28.0	Absolutely
0:28.5	Oh nice fart man
0:30.8	I was sitting on that one for a minute
0:32.3	Have you ever had farts go wrong?
0:34.1	Yes
0:34.5	What are you kidding? I'm American, I'm human
0:37.1	Definitely had some splatter in my day.
0:40.3	Yeah. We've all had a shart. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Trying to think of a good one. One time I sharded on a date,
0:47.2	and I could feel we were going to hook up. And I had to just get out of there, like, get the panties off.
0:55.3	Yeah.
0:55.5	My panties off.
	...

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