Loser Line (2/23/26)

Brooke and Jeffrey

iHeartPodcasts

Relationships, Society & Culture, Comedy

4.7 • 1.9K Ratings

🗓️ 23 February 2026

⏱️ 7 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Don't give that creep at the bar your number! Slip him the Loser Line number instead and we'll play his awful voicemail on the air!

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey girl. What's up with you?
0:02.4	Wait a minute. Is this the right number?
0:04.2	It's the loser line.
0:06.5	Come on. Just call me back.
0:08.6	If you haven't heard the loser line before, it works like this.
0:11.3	Let's say someone approaches you while you're out at the club and drops this charming pickup line on you.
0:16.9	Hey, you exotic thing.
0:19.0	Are you from the Caribbean?
0:21.5	Because Jamaican me horn you.
0:25.9	Whatever you do, don't kick him right in the steel drums and tell him to get lost.
0:30.9	Instead, invite him over for a tasty coconut drink.
0:35.0	And a banana boat ride?
0:36.8	Oh, yeah. I bet you'd like that, Alan. And that's boat ride? Oh, yeah.
0:38.2	I bet you'd like that, Alan.
0:39.7	And that's when you leave him the digits to the loser line.
0:42.0	So hopefully he calls and leaves an awkward voicemail that we can play on the air with messages like this one.
0:47.4	Next message.
0:48.9	Hey, I don't care what the internet says.
0:53.7	Or those dumb ass politicians, mermaids are
0:58.7	real.
1:00.7	I swear.
1:01.7	Everything I was telling you about them, it's true.
	...

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