Hey, weirdos, I'm Cranpus 1.

And I'm Cranpus, actually number 1.

Wow.

I was like 2.

And this is Morbid.

This is Morbid! This is M Listener Tales holiday edition. What Cranpice kind of one said.

What does she think this is?

I'm in my Cranthus vibe.

I'm in my Crippist's fun. I'm bud. Careful. That's what crampus does, okay? You do have the krillics. I know, I have toe krillics and hand krillics. I was very concerned that these be in the shot. Yeah. Yeah. Feet picks. Feet picks. Free feet picks. Well, anyways, this is brought to you by you for you from you and all about you. It's true. Free feet picks.

Well, anyways, this is brought to you, by you, for you from you and all about you. It's true. It's holiday themed, obviously. It's merry as fuck. It's so bright. Let's get into it. Let's get into it. You want to go first or you want me to? Why don't you go first? Okay. I'll let you be crampus one for this. Thanks. This is called listener tale.

Our neighbor was a Dollar Tree Florida man, but make it Alabama. I'm so glad I got to read this. I'll always make... Oh my God, at first I thought he said sexy. But he actually said succeed. Oh, he said succeed. Yeah, I don't know why. I like that. Is he telling me to succeed because he likes you better?

He called you a drip. Well, drip nowadays is pretty cool. Like, I got drip. I don't know if Nicholas is up on the slang. Are you doubting your man? No, I just know he's an elder. I don't know. I think he likes my drip. Anyway, Florida men. He said a drip.

I've never even heard somebody be called a drip. Really? Oh. Oh, damn. Well, I'm old. I'm old. I mean, today we're both ancient. It's true. So, my name is Andrea, and yes, you can use my name. I changed all other names in the tale for you. I'm a long-time creeper, first-time emailer here.

I had to send in this true crime a long-time creeper, first-time emailer here.

I had to send in this true crime slash weird-ass encounter that unfolded over several years ago while my family lived in Mobile Alabama. Mobile Alabama. Mobile Alabama. Mobile Alabama.

Just basically that you have a baby? In a bar? It involves a sketchy neighbor, a literal water heist, a surprise home

intruder, and a toddler conducting inflatable inspections during a SWAT standoff.

That's so much. That's a wild-ass sentence. This is a tail. Well, buckle up and hold on to your

butts. So let's... Hold on. Hold them. So let's rewind around 2019 to 2022. My husband and I

moved to Mobile Alabama. Alabama. Mobile Alabama. Mobile Alabama. From Wichita, Kansas. Oh, is it

Mobile? Mobile. Mobile. Oh, fuck. Deb, Deb just helped us out here because...

Shout out to Deb. Oh, people. We've already gotten... Mobile. We've already gotten 18 emails. Mobile. Mobile. Mobile. So we moved for Mobile to went from... We moved to Mobile from Wichita. That's what we did. My face is itchy. Okay. I was already in a culture shock. It's going to be hard to get out of that. Because of the mobile.

...