Folks, my new graphic novel, Unwanted, a tall tale of the Old Weston New Wave, is out for preorder now.

I've been working on this for 25 years. It's a dark comedy with a shiny exterior. Please check see life. I mean, you just get stuck in the inside. Good afternoon, Michael Malice here. Let that be your welcome for the next hour. You're in for a crazy treat. I had two days, excuse me, of food poisoning. So I was delirious. And I woke up this night for the first night I had two dights. I was walking up four or five times with crazy dreams. So I was a little loopy. So we have the perfect guest, my dear friend Kurt Metzger. You see him on a Jimmy Dorshow. If you're in your town doing stand-up, you have to go see him. And a spiring astronaut. I'm not aspiring. You're respected. As a lifestyle judge. I respect judge fluenter. I cause a lot of judgment. The reason I want to have you on right away is because we talked I mentioned you on Rogan about the Epstein stuff

Before we get to that we were just talking about the Challenger, which was in 1985

I believe and I was yelling at you because you're in your NASA hat

And I said you should be drinking your sprite because the joke was why does NASA drink spryte because they couldn't get seven up

And I said that's a conspiracy. No. Yeah, well

But you were you hold you close my age right yeah 85. That was like nine Yes, so yeah, so I was in a second or third grade right and um, we had to every and a weekly reader That's right. Yeah, and you and you we have reading groups of like so and you name your group like one was the you know Shit like that and boy, they were just spamless with It was like this fucking North Korean propaganda for kids about like we're putting a teacher in space. Look, he boy, put a teacher.

That is not something North Koreans would do, by the way. No, but I'm just saying the thing of where we need you to feel this way right now. Sure, sure, of course. And so at that age, I'm like, I fucking hate school. I mean, I just really want to point out some important for people. All the North Korean propaganda is only about Kim Jong-il. So if you read the propaganda which I had to do to write my book to your reader, none of

the other characters even named.

Yeah, alright.

So it's like Graeme Chung-H Jong-il. So if you read the propaganda which I had to do to write my book, do you reader? None of the other characters you've renamed. Yeah, all right. So it's like Kim Jong-il is talking his teacher, then they go to a factory and the factory owner like literally no one exists as a character except for him. Ah, it's a really one day maybe they will have the honor of that South Korea has of having like two or three of those guys. Well, they have three. They have Samsung who's the great leader Kim Il Sung the do you know the South Korea? I mean what oh who's the South Korean cult because if you were the South Korea you like work for Samsung or kill yourself That's a fact where you got a friend that was the North Koreans always pointed out that South Korea at one point was the suicide capital world It is now and is the capital of killing women We at well when I well, when I say the old lookalike, I'm not saying that to be

razors, they literally get surgery to all look

alike in the free career. The North Korea with lights down south. Okay, wait, no, North Korea gets faster. They're doing now too. And it's like, it's like back back door. It's really gross. Like they I don't believe it.

Anyway, please talk about that. Don't go. Oh my god. You got to go through my ass. We get to my eye. I don't believe it

Okay, anyway, please talk about you know, I said the mirror. I'm hyping up a teacher. Yeah Linspieg's and space is a lazy eagle. Was that her name? No, it was a christmas call. That's right. Yeah, I'll never forget because I would hear Lindsey Eagle. Yeah, is that somebody? It sounds like it if it's not it's a good fake name right. I hope it's on a port star. I just

That's right

The first first first first port and astronaut yeah well yeah yeah so they fucking uh uh what do you call it uh uh we all so I didn't care as a kid I'm like I like I like sci-fi shit because I kid but not if it involved my teacher at school I hated going to school anyway so the big day comes and we all every client and I know I was there all over country and everyone it was required to sit and watch. That's right. A teacher blow up, the seven people blow up and I remember being and some kids so that's the traumatized you on purpose. Yes. And so that's the new is going to blow up. No, I didn't even realize until now do you think that that was intentional? Uh, 100%. Okay.

Should have about space for a while, kids? That's true. Hey, we're not doing all that shit we were about to do. We're not doing it now. That's a little, and so that's called the Twilight language. That speaks to your subconscious, like any kind of NLP. All these scumbag-a-cultist animals that run shit, they are cute. Something like an Andrew Tate, who's a like a set up his own little free masonry. You see his little right hand man, wiki, wiki, eggy, symbol wise, fake name. Okay. The guy looks like every pickup artist from a VH1 show you saw. Well, that's not true because there's two types. mystery and then their style. So styles like me, he's this little person who's and mystery is a foot taller. Okay, we'll describe what he wears. So they both do something called peacocking. Mystery has the top hat with the goggles on it and style would have like a like a snake skin suit. I'll tell you the other. And there'd be a lot of feather boas for some reason, which Which women love obviously. Yeah, you'd, okay, women love, okay, wait, wait,

I'm gonna go to top.

So that guy, that I'm describing, he wears a kung fu kind of shirt. Oh yeah, okay, yeah. And a fedora, of course. Yes, okay, that is peacocking for sure. Yeah, he, and he's like the court magician. and then his brother, what's his name?

Christian Tate is the sublime prince of the organization.

Right.

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