It's the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm bailiff, Jesse Thorne, and with me is Judge John Hodgman. This week's episode was recorded live in Burlington, Vermont.

We talked about what happens when loving couples share their shirts. We talked about mustaches cannot be shared, and what to do when you minorly injure yourself

at home and your partner is squeamish. We had a blast up there in Burlington, Vermont.

Let's go to the stage of the higher ground ballroom.

People of Burlington, Vermont, you asked us for live justice, and we are here to deliver it.

The court of Judge John Hodgman is now in session.

Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom.

Thank you, Dale at Jesse Thorne.

Judge Hodgman re-received a lot of submissions for our show here in Burlington.

Too many to hear live on the stage.

So let's start things off by clearing the docket.

First up is a letter from Cyprus.

Pre... Holy cow. Please order my friend Ribbitt to stop consuming paint. Whether it's solid water colors, leftover paint water, or just straight up paint,

Ribbitt has been eating and drinking paint

with enthusiasm for years.

As someone who has paid the price

for consuming too much paint myself.

I worry paint myself. I worry about Ribbitt's health.

Who is right?

Okay.

We don't make these up.

I can't emphasize that enough.

...