Keeping The Spark In Long Term Relationships With Emily Nagoski - Ep 364

Dear Shandy

Sharleen Joynt & Andy Levine

Tv & Film, Society & Culture, Relationships, After Shows

4.9 • 3.3K Ratings

🗓️ 6 February 2025

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

One of the most common questions Shandy has received over the years has been around keeping the *SPARK* alive in a long term relationship. Who better to help us answer that age old question than legendary writer and sex educator Emily Nagoski, PhD! You know Emily for "Come As You Are", the mega bestseller that—no biggie—REDEFINED WOMEN'S SEXUALITY. Her latest book, "Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections", could not be more on topic for today's conversation! Today Emily teaches how to navigate mismatched libidos, expert tips for orgasming, the 4 big questions couples need to ask themselves, and how to find time for sexy time in a schedule full of to-do lists! Do not miss this one! Thank you to our sponsor! - Go to https://huel.com and use code DEARSHANDY for 15% off your order! More Emily Nagoski: - Emily's latest book, Come Together: https://amzn.to/4hMmlMU - Website: https://www.emilynagoski.com - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enagoski - TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@emilynagoski Time Stamps: 0:00 - Welcome To Emily Nagoski! 3:29 - Long Term Relationship Sex Myths 7:34 - Mismatched Libidos 12:57 - Creating Context/The 4 Questions 15:59 - When You Wish You Wanted It More 17:43 - Sense Of Obligation 26:38 - Orgasm 41:12 - Control 43:51 - Long Term Relationships 48:10 - Body Confidence 50:36 - Emily’s Vibrator Picks 52:58 - Shandy Debrief If you have a relationship question, write us at: [email protected] Subscribe - https://bit.ly/SubscribeDearShandy Listen on iTunes - https://bit.ly/DearShandyiTunes More Dear Shandy Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dearshandy Facebook - https://fb.me/dearshandy More Sharleen Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sharleenjoynt Blog - http://www.alltheprettypandas.com More Andy Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/machinelevine Produced by Gabrielle Galon - https://www.instagram.com/gabsamillion Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:29.8	So I tried that. I put my body in the bed. I let my skin touch my partner's skin. And instead
0:36.3	of going, oh, I like this, I cried and fell asleep.
0:44.4	Dear Shandy.
0:48.5	Welcome back to Dear Shandy listeners.
0:50.7	Hello, Andy.
0:51.8	How are you today?
0:52.7	I'm doing good.
0:53.4	How are you?
0:53.8	I'm doing very good, I'm going to be honest. Yes, I'm very excited about today's guest. Today's guest is kind of a big deal. Can I say that? A little bit. Yeah, yeah, kind of a big deal. She is a therapist, writer, educator, researcher, and activist. She has a PhD in health behavior with a concentration in human sexuality. She is the
1:13.6	author of The Mega Hit. Come as you are. Everyone has heard of it. And the co-author of burnout,
1:19.5	The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle. She has multiple TED Talks online, multiple, and can be
1:26.4	found on Instagram at E. Nagoski and on TikTok at at
1:31.1	Emily Nagoski. And finally, her latest book, come together, the science and art of creating lasting
1:38.4	sexual connections. And we're just so excited. Emily Nagoski, thank you for joining us.
1:43.3	Thank you. That was a delightful introduction. I'm thrilled to be here.
1:47.0	And before we get going, we have a quick disclaimer. Whenever we have a therapist on, I always
1:50.8	like to mention that today's... Oh, yeah. So the only word of that, I'm not a therapist. I'm an
	...

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