Welcome, welcome, welcome, my friends and neighbors,

Mr. and Mrs. America, to the Late Show, I'm your host, Stephen Colbert.

Folks, every so often, I'm firm, but I'm fair, and every so often,

I just gotta take a look at myself in the mirror, just take myself to task for being too focused on all the bad stuff that Donald Trump does.

Because when I do that, sometimes I miss out on all the important things in life, like all

the terrible stuff they're doing in Congress.

Right now, Trump's little Republican buddies are on Capitol Hill trying to come, you know, trying to figure out something else,

but they're, a bill, but they're coming close to Fistakuffs

over his heartless tax cut and boondoggle,

which he's been calling his big, beautiful bill.

It really sounds less like legislation

and more like the husky guy

at a male strip club.

Okay, ladies, coming up on the main stage

is Big Beautiful Bill.

You know him, you love him,

the dad bought Adonis.

He's going to eat a whole pot pie

with his bare hands.

Grab onto those handles, ladies, before he runs off to Home Depot.

The, uh, bubba bill has some real bad goodies in it.

It not only adds over $3 trillion in debt, it cuts so much Medicaid that 7.6 million Americans would lose their health insurance.

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