Intimacy Anorexia: Are You Starving Your Relationship?

Change Your Brain Every Day

Dr Daniel Amen

Braintrauma, Healthtips, Sleep, Obesity, Anxiety, Braininjury, Depression, Ptsd, Mentalhealth, Mood, Brainhealth, Health & Fitness, Energy, Disease, Addiction, Mental Health, Healthadvice, Adhd, Memory, Focus

4.6 • 1.8K Ratings

🗓️ 23 June 2025

⏱️ 30 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What if the pain in your marriage isn’t from fights, cheating, or resentment—but from a hidden condition you’ve never heard of? In this powerful episode, Dr. Daniel Amen and Tana Amen sit down with renowned sex therapist Dr. Doug Weiss to explore Intimacy Anorexia—a silent relationship killer that affects more couples than you might think. Discover the subtle signs, the root causes (including trauma and neglect), and how healing is possible. If you feel more like roommates than soulmates, don’t miss this provocative conversation.

00:00 Intro

01:07 Sponsor

03:37 Intimacy Anorexia in Relationships

05:55 How Pain Manifests in Relationships

09:28 Married & Alone

11:31 Research on Relationship Traumas

13:30 Narcissism: Paying the Bill

16:22 Paradigm for Change

18:32 Origins of Intimacy Anorexics

21:45 Neglect & Spirituality

23:31 Clues to Intimacy Anorexia

25:15 Examining Gender Differences

28:40 Sponsor

29:40 Wrap Up

Dr. Weiss’ new book, Forgiveness for Everyone:

https://www.amazon.com/Forgiveness-Everyone-Dr-Doug-Weiss/dp/1881292592

Transcript

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0:00.0	Women who are married to sex addicts, women who have been cheated on,
0:03.0	and women who have been starred by intimacy andorexia.
0:05.5	We ran them through multiple tests.
0:07.0	They were within one or two percent of each other on every single scale.
0:10.5	So a woman who's being neglected is experiencing the same PTSD as a woman who is being cheated on.
0:16.8	Doug Weiss is a licensed psychologist and the executive director of Heart to Heart Counseling Center.
0:21.8	Known for his work with people struggling with addiction and trauma.
0:25.1	No one wakes up and says, you know, I want to starve my spouse.
0:28.0	Well, they get here through, number one, sexual addiction.
0:30.2	Even if they're using their spouse's body, they're not present.
0:32.3	Their eyes are closed and they're disconnected.
0:34.3	The other reason is sexual abuse. If someone's been sexually abused, sex is painful, and they don't want to go there.
0:38.3	The other one is role model neglect, where mom and dad were intimacy and sex, emotionally
0:43.3	distant, unavailable, or abusive, and unsafe.
0:45.3	And when we're not skilled because of our family of origin, we can duplicate the same patterns
0:49.3	of a lack of intimacy and kid.
0:51.3	What do you do about that?
0:52.3	Well, if you're married and alone, I would definitely...
0:55.0	Every day you are making your brain better or you are making it worse.
1:02.0	Stay with us to learn how you can change your brain for the better every day.
1:11.6	Whether you're a police officer, firefighter, EMT, therapist, or other personnel,
1:18.6	you have to face high intensity, stressful situations on a regular basis.
	...

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