Incel Task Force, Free Vasectomies, and 1 Billion Missing Snow Crabs

The God Pod

God

Humor, Comedy, News Commentary, Satire, Satan, God, News, Montypython

4.7 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 20 October 2022

⏱️ 62 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

On this holy episode of the God Pod, God finds out if Mary Mags believes in him or not. She also brings the gift of uncomfortable truths to help humans grow; they discuss our new snow crab overlord's alliance with elephants for world domination, the Incel Task Force, capitalism breeding loneliness, what it means to be a good person, the cuddle mafia, God's TikTok fart algorithm, and God decides to get a free vasectomy. …. and on JFC LOL they chew on the offensive "I love hot youth pastors" stickers, sleep-deprived holy spirit possession, and the wacky but gross infancy of the Metaverse. So grab your emotional support alligator, and listen on your favorite podcast app. You won't regret it. Or you might. Whatever. The God Pod: Have It Yahweh!! After 6000 years of running the universe, God realized that Satan is kicking his butt, like, really bad. Over the centuries and despite lots of trying, God has not been able to smite the forces of evil. So, he started a podcast to do just that. Full of fun and heart, the God Pod is a twice-weekly opportunity for God to hang out with his fellow deities and maybe even meet some interesting humans. NEW EPISODES MONDAYS AND THURSDAYS The God Pod is everywhere! YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/TheGodPod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thegodpodcast Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheGodPodShow Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/goodgodabove/ Join our Discord server for FREE and hang out with fellow fans of the God Pod:: https://discord.gg/7v3Cc4pjMC Get the God Pod ad-free on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/godpod Find the God pod wherever you get podcasts. thegodpodcast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Today on the God pod I think the snow crabs are gonna turn on the humans like the elephants have
0:06.4	I think nature is waking up watch out. You think that they've gone missing
0:10.8	Maybe they've just gone underground and are forming a billion snow crab strong army and you think how scary that is?
0:20.6	Have you ever seen a coconut crab? Yeah, sorry to the coconut crab, but you got to face only a mother could love
0:26.1	Oh
0:28.1	For everything that's been said about Gen Z years they give me a lot of hope just don't ever change
0:34.3	Years don't become like the boomers before you and millennials. We see you Gen X. Jesus is a huge millennium
0:41.4	He did die at 33 so he's kind of 33 forever
0:47.5	Should I go get a vasectomy Mary? It's one of those things that has two sides to it
0:52.0	Maybe it'll help me get paid maybe that might be a new thing we see
0:55.6	God can stop being an insult where people put it in their bio is like I have a vasectomy and like that's the sexy thing
1:02.2	You know yeah, no kids don't worry
1:17.7	Hi humans this is the God pod I'm God and I am the most high
1:23.8	Seriously, I spoke to a joint right before recording. I am so stone right now
1:30.0	With me today is Mary Magdalene. Hi Mary. Hello
1:33.9	Jesus isn't here this week. So let's talk crap about him. What do you think cool cool cool?
1:39.3	I don't like what he's doing with his hair these days
1:44.2	Tell me again all the hot goss from when you two are in high school. He's a nice guy. We all know he's a good guy
1:50.6	He just had a way, you know
1:53.4	pretentious sometimes but
1:55.4	pretentious precocious
1:57.4	My dad is God type of attitude. Yeah a bit of a no at all right. Was Jesus voted most likely to be crucified?
	...

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