Hey hey! Do you ever struggle with caring for family, friends, and co-workers without pushing your own needs to the back burner? Well, friend, you are precisely in the right place today!  My friend Dr. Alison Cook joins me on the show to talk about her most recent book, The Best of You, which helps us find our true selves while in relationship with God, other people, and ourselves.  During our conversation, Alison teaches us how to find our best and most authentic versions of ourselves in a way that allows us to show up for ourselves before we show up for others. Also, she details some of the ways childhood wounds, confusing church messages, and cultural conditioning toward women and their wants have kept women stuck, overwhelmed, and defeated.  Dr. Alison Cook is a psychologist and the author of two books, including her new book, The Best of You and Boundaries for Your Soul. For 20 years, Alison has empowered women to heal from past wounds, develop a strong sense of self, forge healthy rela­tionships with others, and experience a loving God who is for them. Her weekly email and podcast reach more than 70,000 people. She specializes in bringing faith and psychology together to create real change in people's lives. Alison and her husband, Joe, are the parents of two adult children. They are based out of Boston and spend time in the mountains of Wyoming as often as possible. Listen in to learn more about: How Christian women internalize an unhealthy message of putting our needs and wants last (and how we can work to reverse it!) How to identify the differences between selfishness, selflessness, and selfhood. The signs that we have given up on ourselves and how to rediscover our voice.  Favorite quotes: ~We think of Jesus' words “Love others as yourself.” There is an assumption there that there is a you that is showing up; that you know who that you is that  you are  bringing into relationships but a lot of women don’t understand or don’t feel like they have permission to do that work.   ~When I hide myself, when I make myself invisible, when I play like a doormat, it’s not just bad for me , but I’m not bringing the best of who I am to the people I love.  ~When I’m really being my true self , when I’m aligned with myself, I’m empowering  other people which is what helps them heal and become who they really need to be. ~We are worth so much more than just numbing through all the various ways we can check out ; God wants so much more for us. Links to great things we discussed:  Free Coaching With Alli AWS Internship Program Application: Become an intern on Alli’s team Adele - Easy On Me (Official Lyric Video) - YouTube Abbott Elementary (TV Series 2021– ) - IMDb Podcasts - Armchair Expert Being Known Podcast The Ragamuffin Gospel: Good News for the Bedraggled, Beat-Up … Dr. Alison Cook website The Best of You: Break Free from Painful Patterns, Mend ... - Amazon Amsterdam (2022) - IMDb Join the Confident Motherhood Community here. Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :) xo, Alli