You're listening to be talking about emptiness.

Hi, it's Michelle. So today we're going to be talking about emptiness.

And I have a history with emptiness.

Since the beginning of time, since as far back as I can remember being a little girl growing up in Canada, I've always felt

empty. Sometimes emptiness for me

for me feels like low-grade depression.

Sometimes emptiness for me motivates me to be incredibly curious and so it kind of sometimes looks like ambition

because I'm driven to fill the emptiness and to fill that void and so I'm always constantly trying.

Sometimes emptiness for me looks like excessiveness so I'll buy you know extra groceries that I don't

need or I'll overeat or let's see maybe I'll over commit to something but I've always struggled with

emptiness and I didn't actually know that that word could describe

my heart until I was in high school and I was in a therapy session because I love therapy and

the therapist asked me Michelle what are what are, what's the one word that you would use to describe

yourself?

And I think when she asked me, she was expecting me to say something really positive because I was always a very, you know, outgoing bubbly girl.

But I really sat with that for a moment on the couch and I really sunk into it to that question

and I thought, empty.

I'm just always empty and a lot of times are

a lot of times our destructive behaviors that we create in our lives take root because of our

emotional voids, because of the emptiness inside of us. So as I got older I turned to my

boyfriend to fill my emptiness. I needed him a little too much. I needed the approval of my parents or my friends a little too much. I turned to everybody on the outside to fill that

emptiness inside of me.

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