In a 10 minute conversation, you're likely to be lied to two to three times, and 91% of people lie regularly at home and at work. Now, why do we do that? What drives people's behaviour? And more importantly, can you predict and change that behaviour? Well, these are the questions today's women have impact began to ask herself when she found herself unable to even carry out a conversation in public. A self-proclaimed, boring person, she didn't think she had anything to offer, so why would anyone else be interested? And so it began her fascination into all aspects of human behaviour, from relationships to communication to body language, believing you can't succeed in love, life or business without first. First and foremost, mastering people skills. This then gave birth to the science of people, a human behaviour research lab whose mission it is to crack the code of human behaviour and teach others how to do the same. With over 300,000 students in over 40 countries and 189 cities around the world, her studies and teachings are simply earth-shaking, Like a 7.9 on the Richter scale earth-shaking. Fortune 500 companies such as Google, Dove, Facebook and American Express all seek consultation with her and CNN, NPR, The Wall Street Journal, The Today Show and Forbes magazine can't get enough of her. So please join me in welcoming the author of the National Best Selling Book Captivate. A book that has been translated into over 16 languages, a book that was chosen by Apple as one of the most anticipated books of the year, and a book that has had profound impact on my own marriage and in building our company impact theory. The professional people watcher herself Vanessa Van Edwards. Yay, oh, goodness, that intro was like the nicest thing ever. Gotta run, that's my mom too. Good, welcome to this show. Thank you for having me. When I first started this show, I had a wish list and you were like, right at the top girl. I had an experience recently that I wanted to talk to you about. I was going

to this event. I was had to fly all the way to Vegas. I was only there for three hours. I literally went for the event only. And so on the way there, I'm like, I don't know me go up to people and just chit chat with them. That's not my personality. I'm the awkward person standing the corner waiting for someone to talk to. But going now, I've taken a whole day of work, I've traveled all the way there and paying my expenses, I better make

it worth it.

So I walk in and I'm just awkward. And so I just walk up to people and I'm just like, and I'm just smiling. And I figured it out, but you have such great tips on how to deal with awkwardness because I'm sure everyone at home listening right now has been in this situation, doesn't have to be business, could be family, meeting the in-laws for the first time. Any case. Yeah. So I think that the biggest thing, at least from you with awkwardness, and by the way, I have so been in that room, in that situation, when you break down awkwardness, I think a lot of it come from not having a goal in place.

What I mean by that is if you're walking to an event and you're thinking, I've got to

make it worth it.

And that's actually most events, right?

If you're going to a networking event or a barbecue or a party or a meeting, you're like,

I'm not on how I'm watching Netflix.

I better make this work my while, right?

I got to make it worth putting on the makeup or like, dropping myself into these banks, I gotta make this worth it. That's one goal, but the other goal is, what is my purpose?

So the biggest mistake is when you walk into a room and you're kind of like that wide eye effect of where do I stand? Who do I talk to? What do I do? Adding purpose to your movement is actually one of the easiest ways you can get rid of that first initial awkwardness. So the very first thing you wanna do and when you get into an event is you want to go to where I call a treasure line or a gold spot.

And this is where all that treasure is waiting for you. So the very first thing you want to do and when you get into an event is you want to go to where I call a

Treasure line or a gold spot and this is where all that treasure is waiting for you The rookie mistake is when you walk into a room and you stand right when people enter the room So this is the rookie mistake people get into the room right and they're like Get my name tag put away my coat and stand right at the front trying to get someone else who's new The problem is when you walk into an event, your emotions are at their highest.

You're adrenaline at their highest. put away my coat and stand right at the front trying to get someone else who's new. The problem is when you walk into an event,

your emotions are at their highest.

You're adrenaline at their highest.

And typically when people walk in,

they have to go to the bathroom,

they wanna get some drink,

they wanna get some to eat.

So whatever you do, do not stand in that start zone.

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