How I Went from People Pleaser to Confident Negotiator

Negotiate Anything

American Negotiation Institute

Education, Business, Self-improvement

4.7 • 748 Ratings

🗓️ 5 May 2025

⏱️ 39 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Most people lose negotiations before they even open their mouth — here’s how to change that. In this raw and eye-opening conversation, Kwame Christian reveals the mindset shift that transformed him from a people pleaser into a confident negotiator. You’ll learn why most people fail — not because they lack skill, but because they’re stuck in outdated mental habits. He breaks down the difference between skill and talent, shows you how to disarm conflict with curiosity, and shares the one mental shift that can save any deal when things go wrong. Whether you're leading a team, asking for a raise, or navigating tension at home, this episode will teach you how to stop reacting and start leading the conversation. Connect with Michael ⁠I See What You're Saying Podcast⁠ ⁠Buy The Disciplined Listening Method: How A Certified Forensic Interviewer Unlocks Hidden Value in Every Conversation⁠ h ⁠www.inquasive.com⁠ ⁠michaelreddington.com⁠ ⁠Connect with Michael Reddington on LinkedIn⁠ Contact ANI ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Request A Customized Workshop For Your Company⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow Kwame Christian on LinkedIn⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠negotiateanything.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here to buy your copy of Finding Confidence in Conflict: How to Negotiate Anything and Live Your Best Life!⁠

Transcript

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0:00.0	I'm Michael Redington, and today it is my pleasure to welcome back our next guest, Kwame Christian.
0:08.9	It might be quicker to go through the things he doesn't do than what he does do.
0:12.9	Kwame is the founder of the American Negotiation Institute.
0:16.3	He is the host of the Negotiate Anything podcast, the largest negotiation podcast. He is a two-time author.
0:24.3	He is a keynote speaker. He is an attorney. He is a professor. He is a father, a husband.
0:30.5	The list goes on. He's very smart, has great experience, super nice guy, very generous with this time, and I'm really excited
0:38.9	to share another conversation with you all today. And Kwame and I are going to go through
0:43.8	any number of topics. We're going to let this conversation flow where it goes, but we're going
0:47.5	to start by talking about how he learned to develop confidence during conflict. He's going to do a great job explaining what he believes
0:57.1	the difference between skills and talents are and how we can improve our outcomes if we adjust
1:04.0	our perspective the same way. He's going to share his three-step framework for negotiations,
1:08.9	give several examples for the danger of and how to overcome
1:12.4	attribution bias, and he's going to explain what he believes it means to take on conversational
1:18.9	leadership. And that's just the beginning. So much more. Another great conversation with Kwame.
1:24.5	I feel like we're going to talk to all day, and I'm really excited to share it with you now. So thank you very much for taking the time to join us. Of course, before we get
1:31.2	into the conversation, let's take a quick second to thank our sponsors. First, we have Human Tell.
1:35.9	If you haven't already, please head over to Humantel.com and enter the code in Quasive 25 for 25%
1:42.4	off of their best in class online self-paced training to begin to learn
1:48.0	what people are likely thinking and feeling by recognizing emotional shifts through changing
1:53.8	facial expressions and nonverbal communication. It's a skill that once you learn, it's very hard to
1:59.6	unlearn, and you can start using it in order to maximize your relationships and conversational outcomes.
2:05.1	I highly recommend it.
	...

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