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Today's question comes from Jessica and Nevada. Jessica writes, my partner and I have been together for four

years. Both of us went through horrific divorces. We live together and have part-time custody of our young children from those marriages.

We are about to have a baby together, but do not want to get married even though we are in a committed, loving relationship.

How can we provide security and protection for each other and our baby in case something happens to one or both of us?

My partner has a very well-paying job. I'm a teacher.

Once we have a baby, I'll probably work part-time or stay at home for a while. So how can we

provide security and protection for each other and our baby in case something happens to one or both

of us? You're not like my answer, but get married. And give your kid a legal foundation for which, good gosh, what a mess.

I mean, that's what you need to do.

I mean, are you going to sit down with the wheels and a state's attorney?

I don't know the state of Nevada.

They may have some different legal things, but the greatest gift you could give your kid is to

process and heal from the horrific divorces and both of you all go to the therapy that you need

and get the care that you all need. And then don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

And so you all had a, like, you went through a really tough car wreck.

That doesn't mean we never drive again, but that means we do need to get over the anxiety of

getting a car again. We got to get a new car, but we're going to have to get back out on the road

sometime. And so the safest thing you can do is get married. And then if one of you dies, then there's legal protections across the board there.

But I'd go talk to an estate attorney if you aren't going to do that. I don't really have an

answer for you other than that. Yeah, because I do feel like some people, it's like this avoidance

of like, I don't want marriage because it hurt last time. So we're going to just not deal with it

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