Welcome to Ask Dr. Julie Hanks, a safe place for healing conversations that educate and empower you to prioritize your dreams,

revolutionize your family, and personalize your faith.

I'm your host, Dr. Julie Hanks, a therapist and coach offering online courses and programs to help women all over the world heal themselves and their relationships.

Join me here every week as I coach a listener through a specific challenge and empower them

with tools to improve their lives and your life.

With me today on the show, I am happy to welcome, Cammy.

Welcome.

Thank you.

I'm so happy to be here.

Happy to have you. What is your question for me today?

So I guess it really comes down to assertiveness. I really worked a lot in my relationship, especially

my marriage, to be able to assert myself and ask for what I need. And I feel like I have it down with my husband and we have really good communication.

But in a lot of my other relationships, I have a really hard time just setting boundaries or

telling people what I need from them because I worry about being mean or ungrateful.

So I'd love some help with how to practice that in other relationships.

Okay. Tell me what that would be like for you if someone did think you were mean or ungrateful.

I know I care a lot about what people think of me and I really am, I guess, proud of the fact that people think I'm nice and kind and

easy to get along with like I value that about myself and so I think when even if it's not something

they've said even if I just think that they would see me as not those things it like hits my

self-worth I feel like not the things that make me proud if that

makes sense yeah so if someone thought that you were selfish or mean or that would really

impact how you saw yourself and how you felt about yourself? Yeah, definitely. Okay.

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