4.7 • 3.8K Ratings
🗓️ 23 January 2024
⏱️ 27 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
A parent writes that with her firstborn, she had listened to Janet’s advice and used many of her parenting methods with great success. To her surprise and relief, motherhood was relatively easy, and “I had friends comment how amazing I was as a mother.” After the births of her second and third child, however, things deteriorated. Tantrums, fighting, screaming, hitting, throwing, and all the typical toddler behavior. Gradually, she found herself yelling, threatening, using time-outs, and even spanking. She says she felt terrible and hated her life. As a veteran with 4 deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan, she says ironically, “That life was easy. Being a mom is hard.” Recently, however, she remembered “Unruffled” and the experience she had with her firstborn. She started devouring episodes and says that it all started coming back to her. Her letter describes how she adopted a new perspective and applied Janet’s methods and advice immediately—with miraculous results. “It has been an amazing shift in the household ever since I have adopted this approach… so many more hugs and them telling me they love me.” Janet uses this parent’s hopeful letter to illustrate how small alterations to our interactions, and especially our perspective, can transform our relationship with our kids and bring the joy we deserve to the parenting experience.
Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com.
Her best-selling books No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline without Shame and Elevating Child Care: A Guide to Respectful Parenting are available in all formats at Amazon, Apple, Barnes & Noble, and Google Play.
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0:00.0 | Wunderry Plus subscribers can listen to Unruffled ad free right now. |
0:05.0 | Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery App or on Apple Podcasts. |
0:09.0 | Hi, this is Janet Landsfury. Welcome to Unruffled. Today I'm going to be sharing a note I received from a parent, the subject line, immediate success. |
0:31.0 | And she details what she did to break out of this pattern that she was in that wasn't working. She was doing all kinds of things as a parent that she doesn't believe in that she didn't want to do. |
0:36.0 | Feeling angry, she says, I defaulted to anger and to what I'd seen my parents do. |
0:41.0 | And then she made a shift, which she talks about. |
0:45.8 | Now her children are telling her they love her, and she's feeling worlds better about |
0:52.1 | their relationship, herself as a parent, and their days. |
0:56.7 | So I'm excited to share this note with you and also offer some commentary on why I think what she did is helping and the reason I |
1:06.1 | thought this would be a wonderful thing to share today on my podcast is that I'm |
1:11.8 | often offering examples of what to do differently, |
1:16.4 | but to actually hear from a parent, |
1:18.8 | what she did differently is, I think, |
1:21.9 | much more powerful and will be much more helpful to you. |
1:26.0 | So here's the note I received. |
1:28.0 | Dear Janet, first off, I just have to say, wow, thank you. |
1:32.0 | I'm not normally inclined to leave feedback either positive or negative |
1:35.2 | on things. However, I just had to let you know the impact you have had on my four-year-old, two-year-old, and |
1:41.6 | 11-month-old, and me this last week. I will never go back to the way it was |
1:46.4 | before. Here's the story. I had listened to some of your podcasts and read some of your |
1:51.0 | blogs before my first was born. |
1:53.0 | I remember thinking how great it sounded to parent with this style |
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