Tonight's topic is narcissism.

And most of the, a lot of the information I'll be using is a great, is two great

20th century psychologists, one by the name of Heinz Kohut, who's the founder of the psychology

of self and was really highly regarded for his work on narcissistic personality disorder and his other concepts of narcissism and also the other James Masterson who wrote the search for the real self and was the founder of the Payne Whitney

Clinic and a very influential pair of psychological theorists and also we'll be talking about

the Buddha's insights into the South. So a lot of us like to believe that we don't have narcissistic tendons.

Oh, I'm not a narcissist.

That person's a nice man'm not me me.

But actually, that shows that we don't really know what we're talking about.

Because actually, if you don't have any narcissistic tendencies,

then you're probably definitely a narciss

or you've got borderline personality disorder.

So I wouldn't opt for that.

Basically, COA theorized that there's healthy narcissism, which is now

the de facto standard that every psychologist works from that there's healthy narcissism

which is basically that sense that we can accomplish things in the world that

we can get things done, that people will care about our

ideas, that we have some efficacy, that we can empathize with others in a

meaningful way, that we can play a constructive role in the world.

If you don't have those tendencies, you're going to desperately try to get them from somebody else.

The theory goes that if a parent actually gives the child consistent messages of love, care, being prized and values,

that a child will not grow up narcissists but will grow up in fact with healthy narcissism.

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