He Bed, She Bed

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

World, Knowledge, John Hodgman, Kids & Family, Pc, Information, More, Show, Judge, John Hodgeman, Comedy, Relationships, Society & Culture, Mac, Jesse Thorn, Justice

4.8 • 7.9K Ratings

🗓️ 6 September 2017

⏱️ 51 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Tom brings the case against his wife, Myranda. Myranda complains that Tom’s snoring and other nighttime habits keep her awake. She wants to start sleeping in a separate bedroom, but Tom is opposed. Who's right? Who's wrong? Thank you to Tim Mallos for suggesting this week's title! To suggest a title for a future episode, like Judge John Hodgman on Facebook. We regularly put out a call for submissions.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast.
0:05.6	I'm Baylor F. Jessie Thorne.
0:07.0	This week, he bed, she bed.
0:10.2	Tom brings the case against his wife Miranda.
0:12.7	Miranda complains Tom snoring in other nighttime habits keep her awake.
0:17.4	She wants to start sleeping in a separate bedroom.
0:20.4	Tom is opposed.
0:22.2	Who's right?
0:23.2	Who's wrong?
0:24.2	Only one man can decide.
0:26.0	This rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural
0:31.8	reference.
0:33.5	As for my being half-witted, well, what can I say?
0:38.2	Except that I have survived a middle age with half my wits while thousands have died with
0:42.9	all of theirs intact.
0:45.5	Evidently, quality of wits is more important than quantity, senators.
0:50.4	I shall do nothing unconstitutional.
0:52.2	I shall appear at the next session of this fake internet court where you may confirm
0:57.6	me in my position or not as you wish, but if it pleases you not to explain your reasons
1:04.4	to my bailiff, not me.
1:07.7	Baylor, Jessie Thorne, swear to the litigants in.
1:10.3	Please rise and raise your right hands.
	...

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