I always felt like I had to inhabit this kind of mode of being, this role of performing,

of doing for someone else. It took me until I was entering my 30s. The symptoms I began to then

explode outward. I was exhausted. I was depleted. I was resentful. I was disconnected. I didn't

have the language until I understood that, Nicole, the reason why you're all of those

things is because you bring up this idea of self. You ask me, who am I? I didn't know who I was.

I didn't know what my body's needs even were. I didn't know where my limits were. I kept overstepping

when I was tired, always showing up because my friend invited me, not allowing myself to say,

no, my body is tired. I don't have the resources. Emotionally, always showing up because my friend invited me, not allowing myself to say, no, my body is

tired. I don't have the resources. Emotionally, always showing up for someone else. I didn't have

space for myself. Hello, and welcome to a very special spiritual moment in my life in this episode of the how to human podcast. My name is Sam

Lamott. I'm the host. I'm a teen dad, college dropout, ex meth head, person who's been sober

for 11 years and really trying to figure out how to exist in this human life in a way that

brings me the most contentment and fulfillment and joy every now

and again, hopefully more than every now and again. This episode was two or three years in the making.

I reached out to Nicole LaPera, who you may know as the holistic psychologist, if you follow her on

Instagram.

A couple years ago, it was a long shot.

I just said, hey, we got this program.

We're doing really well.

There's a lot of amazing, interesting guests wanting to be on the program because of the depths of vulnerability and realness that we reach and the care that we put into

these conversations,

would you consider being on the show? And she said yes. So we had plans. It was going to happen.

...