FACTS vs. FEELINGS in Marital Arguments

Fierce Marriage

Ryan and Selena Frederick

Religion & Spirituality, Christianity

4.8 • 4.2K Ratings

🗓️ 8 April 2025

⏱️ 31 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

"Facts don't care about your feelings." Or do they? In this episode we'll discuss why facts, feelings, AND trust all matter for productive dialogue (and arguments) in marriage. Master marital communication: https://speak.fiercemarriage.comTake the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge: https://31daypursuit.comPray for your spouse with intention: https://40prayers.comTo learn more about becoming a Christian, visit: https://thenewsisgood.comThis ministry is entirely listener-supported. To partner with us, visit https://fiercemarriage.com/partner Good news! You can now find FULL video episodes on our YouTube channel, The Fierce Family. Visit https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkyO4yVeRdODrpsyXLhEr7w to subscribe and watch. We hope to see you there!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Everything is emotive, everything is feelings, but we need to learn how to be a little bit more emotionally intelligent sometimes.
0:05.5	I trust you to discern if I'm being too emotional about a situation.
0:09.6	And even in our marriage, you know, when it's heated and things are kind of going everywhere,
0:13.5	I can tell when I'm being emotional, like more than I should.
0:16.8	Arguing well is always better than arguing less.
0:20.4	Truth of facts and feelings. They're both
0:23.4	important. But there's a third element in here and that's just trust. You're going to have a hard time
0:27.2	advancing. All right. So if you have Logos and you have pathos, you have truth and you have the
0:31.6	feelings that go with it, but you don't have trust. It doesn't matter how true you are. Doesn't matter
0:35.3	how kind you're being to me. I don't trust you.
0:37.8	Facts equal truth.
0:38.8	And that's why facts matter, because truth actually does matter.
0:41.8	And we want to get to the truth.
0:43.8	We don't want to live as if truth's not real.
0:45.8	Feelings are indicators, not dictators.
0:47.8	But they indicate something that they don't dictate the truth.
0:50.8	But they indicate something about the truth.
0:52.8	The truth.
1:03.0	It may feel like we talk about arguing a lot on the Fierce Marriage podcast, and I think for good reason, because arguments are a large part of building a relationship, building
1:10.1	my marriage with somebody.
1:11.6	And arguments aren't necessarily bad, but bad arguments are bad.
1:15.8	And so we spend a lot of time talking about the different angles around how to communicate
	...

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