BOUNDARIES: Dealing with Toxic In-Laws

Fierce Marriage

Ryan and Selena Frederick

Religion & Spirituality, Christianity

4.8 • 4.2K Ratings

🗓️ 1 April 2025

⏱️ 35 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Boundaries are meant to establish healthy order in relationships, not create isolation. But what does it look like when you need to set boundaries between your marriage and your in-laws? What justifies them, and what’s the ultimate goal in having these boundaries? We pray this episode is helpful for you!Master marital communication: https://speak.fiercemarriage.comTake the 31-Day Pursuit Challenge: https://31daypursuit.comPray for your spouse with intention: https://40prayers.comTo learn more about becoming a Christian, visit: https://thenewsisgood.comThis ministry is entirely listener-supported. To partner with us, visit https://fiercemarriage.com/partner Good news! You can now find FULL video episodes on our YouTube channel, The Fierce Family. Visit https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkyO4yVeRdODrpsyXLhEr7w to subscribe and watch. We hope to see you there!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Our goal for setting a boundary, maybe for a unhealthy behavior, is not to isolate, but it ideally would be to reconcile at some level.
0:09.3	And then somewhere out, if you radiate outward, so we have marriage boundary, we have the family boundary, and now there's this, what I'll say, outer community boundary.
0:16.9	It doesn't mean that we don't have reliance on our community.
0:19.0	It doesn't mean we don't value our community.
0:38.1	It just means that there's an order there, Or you can't monopolize my wife's time and they can't monopolize my time. Our time needs to be reserved for each other. So there's a time boundary. How do I set your emotional boundaries? You can't control whether they choose to respect these boundaries, but you can't control how you let it affect you.
0:43.3	The self-control piece can really only flow out of a heart that's been changed by the Lord,
0:46.8	and that is being sanctified, and that is secure in our relationship,
0:49.5	secure in who he is in Christ.
0:52.1	Sit down and write out what are those boundaries in each one of those areas for specifically for the in-law relationship we've done a number of these episodes on in-laws and boundaries and I feel like
1:06.2	we constantly are coming up against not necessarily new problems, but old problems in new ways.
1:12.7	And then coming up with how the Lord would like us to deal with those problems and those,
1:18.4	like how do you instill a boundary with your in-laws?
1:21.5	Should you instill a boundary? What kind of boundary? How long should there be a boundary?
1:25.3	You know, these are all questions of, you know,
1:28.0	we don't want to set a boundary up and just run away in isolation, right? We don't get permission
1:32.3	in scripture to do that. But how do we deal with our in-laws when they're being difficult
1:37.1	or when they're maybe berating our spouse? And maybe it's been like that from the start. What is,
1:42.6	what should be our godly response to that, Ryan Frederick?
1:45.6	Yeah, and what role in this case does a husband play in tending and keeping or providing and protecting, namely the protecting part with those boundaries in mind?
1:54.4	So it takes a lot of clarity.
1:56.1	It takes some courage and it takes conviction.
1:59.0	And so we're going to talk about that on the other side.
	...

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