I'm coming for all of you.

For all of you.

Right now there's a 15-year-old-old Right now there's a 15-year-old sophomore in high school who has no idea they're studying nursing just so they can wake my ass in 17 years

I'm 50 and single that's a fantastic combination I'm going to spend my golden years dating a handful of spit and a jug of astrolide

hey what's happened at mike Schmidt 40-year-old boy podcast does it sound weird does it sound my golden ears dating a handful of spit and a jug of astroglide.

Hey, what's happened at Mike Schmidt's 40-year-old boy podcast? Does it sound weird? Does it sound different to your ears? Your virgin ears? Are there virgin ears? I think are your ears virgin

if you've ever had a cock in them? I think that's the rule. That's the baseline. If somebody

puts a cock in your ear, you no longer have virgin ears. That's the only way you can have them. Because I've heard virgin years for a very long time. And I've always thought to myself, why? What are the virgin from what? From a cock, certainly.

And if you get a cock in the ear, Jesus Christ, who's having that conversation? And if you've

had a cock in the air, don't admit it. Literally do not. Just go, I don't know how the fuck that happened. Did you have a cock in your ear?

Of course I didn't.

Why would that happen?

Oh, God damn it.

I think you did.

I don't know if your doctor's going to use the word, goddammit, but he might.

Because I'll tell you what, if he stumbles upon a case of gonorr in the goddamn ear. Getting back to the point, does it sound different?

Does it sound different to you guys?

Because I'm in a different zone.

I'm in a different atmosphere.

I'm in a different area code.

Not a different zip code.

Well, different zip code as well, but not a different time zone.

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