It cannot have escaped your attention that there is a small contingent of our nation that poses a threat to our way of life.

They want us to stop farming our most prized delicacy on the grounds of their moral concerns. We must not let them push us around.

As you well know, it has always been an important part of our culture. Why should we assume

that this small group of radicals have got it right and that our ancestors have all been wrong?

Think of all the memories we've shared when eating the meat around the table with our families.

It is a wonderful thing.

Secondly, I have yet to come across anyone who doesn't gain great satisfaction from the delicious taste of the meat.

Whether it is in patties, ground mints or slices, it is enjoyed by billions every day.

Imagine the backlash if we showed sympathy to the radicals.

Think about all the businesses that rely on the meat for their income. It would be political suicide.

Finally, and most importantly, we must always remember the natural order of things. We are top of the

food chain and is our right to exercise our dominion.

Every test we have conducted on the creatures have proven them to be inferior, be it intelligence,

strength or a capacity to live what we all say is a fulfilling life. I know that you must feel the

same. All I ask is for permission to deal with the radicals.

Eating human meat should never be up for debate.

Hello and welcome to episode 99 of the Pantai cast.

I'm the utilitarian counting everybody for one, but nobody for more than one, Mr. Jack Symes, and I'm joined once again by the Aristotelian slave owner who treats animals as mere instruments. It's Mr. Olly Marley. Hello. And the Kantian who only refrains from kicking dogs because he doesn't want to hurt himself. It's Mr. Andrew. Hello. This is very exciting. It's the first time in all of 2021 we've been able to see each other. We haven't seen each other in ages and we've got to

speak about the elephant in the room. Oh, are you looking fantastic? Why is that an elephant in the room?

I always look fantastic. I think it's the fedora maybe. That's like a nice little, is that something

you've adopted during lockdown? Yes, I adopted many new fashion styles and now wear a fedora, a pink blazer and a cravat at all times.

Those feather earrings as well?

...