Episode 79: Sexual Health and Intimacy with Dr. Joe Kort
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 574 Ratings
🗓️ 7 July 2020
⏱️ 50 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
When we're talking about marriage, sex is an important topic. So in the month of July, we are talking ALL about sex and intimacy. I'm kicking off the month with Dr. Joe Kort. Dr. Joe is a Licensed Sex and Relationship Therapist who is trained in Sex Therapy and Imago Relationship Therapy (you know I love my Imago peeps!). Dr. Kort specializes in working with sexual dysfunction, relationship concerns, and with individuals identifying as LGBTQ and presenting issues.
Something I see a lot in my work is when someone gets caught cheating, and then they claim to be a sex addict. One of the reasons I wanted to talk with Dr. Joe was to ask him, "What is a sex addict?" Dr. Joe shares why he thinks there is no such thing as sex addiction and what he sees within his work instead.
We also explore whether or not porn is a sexual health crisis, how to negotiate erotic differences, and maneuvering through a mixed-orientation relationship.
Some deep stuff here, folks!
Show Highlights
- There is a difference between sex addiction therapy and sex therapy - not all therapists are created equal. (9:00)
- Why the term sex addiction boxes people in. (12:00)
- How to broach the subject of porn, open-relationships, and other vulnerable conversations about sex. (15:14)
- How erotic orientation differs from sexual orientation. (20:00)
- Is porn a sexual health crisis? (23:22)
- Negotiating erotic differences with your partner and having erotic empathy. (34:09)
- How you can recover from infidelity. (36:00)
Learn More About Dr. Kort:
Dr. Joe Kort is a Licensed Sex and Relationship Therapist. He is trained in Sex Therapy and Imago Relationship Therapy. Dr. Kort specializes in working with sexual dysfunction, relationship concerns, and with individuals identifying as LGBTQ and presenting issues. He is the author of four books: 10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Improve Their Lives, 10 Smart Things Gay Men Can Do To Find Real Love, LGBTQ Clients in Therapy: Clinical Issues and Treatment Strategies, and Is My Husband Gay, Straight, or Bi?: A Guide for Women Concerned about Their Men. Dr. Kort is a blogger for Psychology Today. He is also the Co-Director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes' LGBTQIA Affirmative Therapy Certification and the Couples and Sex Therapy Certification Programs. He works with Modern Sex Therapy Institutes to provide Certification trainings including Sex Therapy Certification and continuing education to mental health and medical professionals around the world. He also has a podcast, www.SmartSexSmartLove.com. His website is www.JoeKort.com
Resources & Links:
Dr Kort's website
Dr. Kort's on Twitter
Dr. Kort's on Facebook
Kate on Dr. Joe's Podcast
The Ultimate Divorce Survival Guide
Should I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 0:17.7 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate some of |
| 0:23.3 | the roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. I've been to |
| 0:29.1 | hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side of this process |
| 0:35.1 | with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 0:43.3 | Hey everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. This month, |
| 0:51.0 | we are going to be talking about sex. |
| 0:55.6 | Sex and intimacy. |
| 0:57.7 | And I've sort of, I've done a bunch of interviews on this and I'm excited to bring you sort of different perspectives and different topics around sex and intimacy. |
| 1:08.6 | And I think this is a really, I mean, God, it's such an important topic, right? |
| 1:13.4 | When we're talking about marriage. |
| 1:14.9 | Hello. |
| 1:16.2 | And, you know, one of the reasons I wanted to bring in sort of all different points of |
| 1:20.4 | view on this and different research and different experts is because, you know, I see |
| 1:25.4 | so much in talking to my clients and in my Facebook group |
| 1:29.7 | conversations about sex and intimacy and what it really is. |
| 1:33.0 | And I mean, what intimacy is in general, right? |
| 1:36.5 | I mean, I think that one of the things that I hear a lot and I think I've experienced also as a woman is that in many ways, women view |
| 1:47.2 | sex as an extension of the intimacy that's already been created in long-term relationships. |
| 1:53.4 | We often use sex as a way to sort of falsely create that intimacy in the short term. |
| 1:59.0 | But ultimately, in long-term relationships, we are inspired and we |
| 2:03.6 | want to have sex when there is a level of intimacy. And I think that often men see sex as a way |
... |
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