Episode 62 - Dick on Fractions

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 8 August 2017

⏱️ 83 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Rage math, fat mannequins, my man moves to Abu Dhabi, fit models for your fly, getting stranded, the world's most fun car, surprise parties, Target vs. CVS, an existential crisis over a cute waitress, a weight loss tip you've never heard before, making out with beer, Google's War on Engineers, and the show gets a producer; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Presenting Dick. Dick.
0:14.0	Ready.
0:15.0	Yeah!
0:18.0	Yeah!
0:20.0	Yeah!
0:21.0	Welcome to Dick! You need Dick you on Dick, you love Dick. It's the show where everything is a podcast.
0:28.0	I'm your host, Dick Masterson bringing the show to you from a mountain bunker deep in the hall. Mr. engineer. Hello Dick. Hey what's up buddy I can barely get it out today. Yeah. I'm so
0:44.0	fucking pissed right now I can barely get it out today. I can barely get it out today.
0:49.6	Yeah. It's gonna be a speedy show. Yeah. Because this is, this is, this is the 11th hour, the witching hour.
0:57.0	Yeah, it's the, the, the status of North Korea's nuclear threats against the US could be described by the by
1:08.2	this show's lateness toward the clock of midnight you understand what I'm saying? Yeah You understand what I'm saying?
1:13.8	Yeah, you understand what I'm saying, vaguely?
1:16.1	Yeah.
1:16.6	It's the 11th hour.
1:18.4	This has to be done and out the door.
1:21.3	Yes.
1:21.7	I had a great plan. Uh-huh. You see? The best laid plan. the best light plans
1:25.0	I had a great plan man man I had it all fucking planned out but I got
1:29.3	fucked so badly today I have been in airports and bullshit for what time is it now
1:38.4	nine o'clock dude I I've been on I've been on, I've been on, I've been traveling within the, within the same state for about 11 hours, for 12 hours.
1:51.0	Yeah. And I've, and I've paid for that much traveling too is how fucked I've got today
1:56.4	planes, trains, and automobiles all coal, semi-colon part two dick gets fucked by all of the above
	...

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