Episode 49 - Dick on Interrupting

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 9 May 2017

⏱️ 135 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A Day of Interrupting, television addiction, Big Breakfast is killing you, Sean's voice is killing you, Asterios vs. WarOfTheFanBoys, the billboard, The Dick Show sends an autism to Cannes, being on Gavin McInnes, pointless research on gender binaries, cringe-ophobia, airlines and my biggest fantasy, the adventures of Cadyver, Phteven's various side businesses, Dustin's first bit, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, the time Tucker Max hit on my girlfriend, whatever happened to Lettuce Jones, Layc is single, and Sean interrupts me while I'm working it; all that and more this week on The Dick Show.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Presenting Dick. Dick.
0:14.0	Ready.
0:15.0	Yeah!
0:17.0	Yeah!
0:20.0	Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Welcome to Dick. You need Dick, you want Dick. Yeah
0:30.7	Welcome to Dick. You need Dick you want Dick you love Dick you got it. It's the show where everything is a contest coming to you live from a mountain bunker
0:36.1	in the city of failure. I'm your host Dick Masterson with me as always Sean the audio engineer hello Dick hey it's the only show where you can experience the Zingers barely this time of Sean the audio engineer what's up buddy we'll see you
0:46.0	get a bit yeah every third word will come out clear you sound you sound like a
0:51.8	tiger has banged your throat with those barbed
0:54.8	you sound like something you sound like a living cigarette has you've performed oral
0:59.7	on a living cigarette that's pretty cool huh you sound man. I sound like Tom Waits. You sound like Tom Waits and Tom Likis. Yeah, you sound like Tom Waits is Danny DeVito. If there was a twins and Tom Waits had the good voice and you have the shitty voice what
1:16.8	I'm getting too old for this shit rigs. Yeah you sound like garbage we have to record it we have to record this show on a Friday night and not just any Friday night,
1:27.0	Cinco de Mayo Friday night.
1:29.0	Yeah.
1:30.0	Cinco de Mayo is the only day that you can legally drink at work.
1:35.0	That's the special, that's Cinko de Mayo for me.
1:40.0	So I've put off drinking at home.
1:45.0	Shut up. I put off drinking all day, all day to do this show with you tonight
1:50.0	and you cannot speak.
1:52.0	You son of a bitch. And you cannot speak.
1:55.0	You son of a bitch. Sorry.
1:56.0	No, don't be sorry.
	...

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