Episode 248 - Dick on The Uniparty

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 1 March 2021

⏱️ 120 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Crippled Jesus is guilty on all counts, blue collar witch hunts, the green flash is a myth, white math, Mx. Potato Head, ruining your wife's conspiracy theories, having an honest conversation about the p*ssy, my girlfriend believes in a different God, Cialis chasers, stubby pencils, and showing my dog on camera; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Is the dog done taking a shit out there?
0:03.7	Probably not.
0:05.6	You know, they do wreak her out coming in here.
0:07.7	People scream in like lunatics.
0:10.0	Well, but you know, they get used to it,
0:11.7	desensitized.
0:12.7	Yeah, yeah, they do.
0:16.1	Voice mails.
0:17.8	All right.
0:20.4	And now I must sort my papers, please.
0:27.2	Watch your spilling this week.
0:29.2	I got it, you know what?
0:30.1	I got a smaller cup on purpose.
0:31.7	It did.
0:32.6	Just so when it happens,
0:34.4	80s girls said to me that the worst part about the spill
0:39.4	was that I was looking at the old TV to my right
0:43.5	as I was trying to do something.
0:45.0	And that's when I spilled,
0:46.6	even though I had just put the TV on,
0:48.9	installed it in front of me.
0:50.3	So I no longer had to look over my shoulder.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Dick Masterson, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Dick Masterson and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.