Episode 219 - Dick on the Big Countdown to Nothing

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 11 August 2020

⏱️ 150 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Nothing is ever happening, pulling your penis while doing Kung Fu, a week of cold showers, putting the Switch away wrong, more cops murdering people, Taylor from PKA proves Hellen Keller is a phony, KFC's very racist ad, Orc Girl and donkey transformation, Sean’s Animal Corner, the coin shortage, Biden's Vetting process, and Maddox tries to tone down the anti-semitism on his Twitch channel; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	You know what I, you know what my kind of porn is? I've been lying about going to
0:04.9	Google. I go to the breast reduction plastic surgeons and I look at the
0:09.1	before pictures. Yeah, that's a good one. That's a... It sounds like the start of a stand-up.
0:15.0	That's the start of a stand-up.
0:17.0	That's my memoirs.
0:20.0	That title.
0:21.0	That entire thing is the title.
0:22.0	Looking at the after pictures as akin to murder for you.
0:25.0	I'm going to fire bomb.
0:27.0	That's going to be my, like people fire bomb abortion clinics.
0:30.0	I'm going to show up at one of those.
0:32.0	Yeah, it caused breast reduction surgeons.
0:34.0	If I have cancer, like that's it, I'm done with these doctors.
0:37.0	Yeah, that's it.
0:37.4	I'm done with the butchery that they put women through.
0:40.4	Right.
0:41.2	That is where you are lockstep with women in, you know, cases of mutilation.
0:47.0	That's going to be my unibomer.
0:50.0	Your manifesto?
0:51.0	Manifesto, yeah, I'm going to mail those packages around only to breast reduction
0:57.4	you have to have dreams I make the browser all big so I can't see that like I zoom in so I can't see the after yeah
1:05.0	And then I just scroll through oh yeah sometimes I scroll down so you can see one boob on the frame and then you got to go to scroll down a little bit more to see the other one
	...

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