Episode #1551: Keep Polishing That Turnip

TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL

Leisure, Comedy

4.8 • 2.4K Ratings

🗓️ 6 March 2014

⏱️ 76 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Luke and Andrew try to get On Their Media, but end up talking about sexual harassment HR videos, and annoying "satire" websites.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Ha ha, what's up? I'm Bubs, try the new Doritoshell Taco from Taco Bell! Ha ha ha! Doing it and doing it and doing it well! Doing it and doing it and doing it well! Doing it and doing it and doing it well!
0:14.1	I represent Taco Bell Doritos y'all, huh?
0:16.9	Wooo!
0:17.7	Wooo!
0:19.7	T-B-T-L!
0:25.2	I'm strong, y'all. I'm very sure I can sleep in a bucket. I'm fast, I got stamina, I don't look it, and I know magic.
0:31.4	My worst quality is that I'm a perfectionist. Let me mention this.
0:34.4	DOSI. I am agreeable to a fault.
0:38.1	Let me tell you something. I've been around since 1980, f***ing age.
0:44.1	I ain't a robber being a little gay. Everybody's a little gay.
0:47.6	Hello, Miss USA. It's an honor.
0:50.1	Miss America. I wish I could see you.
0:51.6	But close enough.
0:52.4	It's America. It's universe, in my book, in my book.
0:55.0	Oh, okay. Well, thank you very much.
0:56.5	Listen, Cracker Jack, if you're going to be televised, you've got to be easy on the eyes.
1:00.8	There's no good if people hate looking at you. You need a suit, a tie,
1:06.2	and some bril cream. Let's get to the jokes.
1:15.1	And that would explain why we're doing a podcast.
1:19.4	Just a people hate looking at us, but they do love listening to us.
1:22.8	This imaginary radio show that we say just might be too beautiful to live.
1:26.7	It's called T-B-T-L. Hey, I'm your host, Luke Burbank.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from TBTL, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of TBTL and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.