Episode 152 - Dick on a Mission from God

The Dick Show

Dick Masterson

Dickmasterson, Biggestproblemintheuniverse, Comedy

4.8 • 1.3K Ratings

🗓️ 30 April 2019

⏱️ 160 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

My visa is finally denied, knock-off legos, Mortal Kuckbat 11, a guy pees on a midget, the mirrors in my house are all a forehead too high, the mushroom cosplay cult, the problems with being innocent, Nick Rackets calls in about Vic Lasagna, addictive butt tattoos, Andrew from Eugene Oregon's wife's bikini contest, the cellophane freshness tops on yogurt that women don't throw away, environmental sensibilities, Asterios updates his pronouns, and where not to go during a mass shooting; all that and more this week on The Dick show!

Transcript

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0:00.0	The ragers got a lot of ink.
0:03.0	Yeah, he does have a lot of ink.
0:06.0	I don't know.
0:07.0	How far does it go all the way all over the place?
0:09.0	Do you have any penis tattoos?
0:10.0	I'll ask you.
0:11.0	Do you have anything referencing like your asshole or like an arrow or anything like that?
0:15.0	I see I knew it. I saw that guy. I'm like that guy has some kind of a
0:19.0	fucking joke either about his dick or his ass-
0:22.0	What is your asshole tattoo?
0:23.3	Wait, hop on the mic for a second.
0:25.0	Hang on, I'll bet you...
0:26.0	I'll use this as the cold open.
0:27.0	What is your asshole tattoo, sir?
0:29.0	This is like, exit only or something like that, right?
0:32.0	What is, yeah?
0:33.0	But hell assholes are for pooping.
0:35.0	Yeah.
0:36.0	Just think, just in case, what is your, what is your but hole tattoo say?
0:39.0	No, man, something even better than that.
0:41.0	So I was on a, I was on a reality TV show called
0:43.4	tattoos after dark okay and I ran for one season I was on the pilot episode yeah
	...

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