I'm a cut to the chase. Please do. I'm an athlete, but I'm also a businessman. You've got a classy joint here. Yeah.

And you're trying to lure customers in

with caveman spending a sign around. It's actually it's technically a rangatang.

Well, it just seems to me an establishment such as this could go for an overhaul in the advertising spokesman game.

I'm talking about a real celebrity. Not some sign spinning monkey.

I'm like me in the store. Live uncut in person. Bring it in the customers.

Lube in the deals. Holy s**t. This must be my s**t and lucky day. First off,

Kenny Powers walks into my showroom and then he says he wants to do personal appearance. It's goddamn amazing.

Woop. Yeah. Woop. Yeah. I got a lot of star power and I think it would make this night a grand success.

And I think it'll only cost you two grand. Yeah, I'm going to pay you a hundred bucks.

The humongous part about being a celebrity is cashing in on it, making s**t loads of money,

having expensive luxurious things. That way in case one day you're not famous,

you can still be rich as hell in better than everyone around you.

Okay, so now we have two catch 22 situation simultaneously. Is there even a name for that?

How about catch 44? I mean, you don't know how to do anything, but you have so much potential.

Wait a minute. This isn't my world. Disappointed!

Oh, and it's just getting started at disappointment. Believe you me,

as we enter into the gates of a Wednesday afternoon edition of TVTL,

the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host. This is episode 1233 in a collector series.

Oh man. Well, we've been busy here at the radio station raising money for foster kids.

What the f**k have you been doing? Not to start things out unnecessarily.

...