Mr. Bluestine, Montezuma's revenge is nothing more than good old-fashioned American diarrhea.

Adult diapers should never even enter the picture.

So he'll lose a few pounds.

T-B-T-L!

Oh, yeah, that's all.

It's also, by the way, a common side effect of listening to a Tuesday afternoon edition of T-B-T-L.

This is the show that's probably too beautiful to live.

100 a day. I've hundered a week. That's rich.

That is rich. My name is Luke Burbank, weighing in 187 pounds. I don't care, you know why?

It's my note that today.

That's right. I can do whatever I want. The Zepsod 1000 and 76th in a collector's series.

We've got lots of stuff.

Hi, this is Luke's Mom Susie, coming tonight on T-B-T-L.

Following up yesterday's incredibly popular segment called,

would you jump into a vat of acid for me, co-worker?

We bring you another new segment.

Would you fight a cheetah for me, co-worker?

Because, well, whereas yesterday there was an act of great heroism that went on today,

the story brings us an act of something less than heroism.

Also, we will, once again, see what one and a half men can figure out

when it comes to talking about issues that pertain to female kind.

That's, of course, when Andrew and I put our two male heads together and see what we can

...