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Slack.com slash DHQ. Democrats are shocked and also appalled that Republicans will not

accept Joe Biden's defeat of the illegitimate president who illegally cheated Hillary

Clinton out of a rightful victory by his conspiracy with Vladimir Putin to put an ad on Facebook.

The Democrats are demanding that the racist, fascist, sexist, homophobic, stinkpot-dung

faced Republicans embrace the new spirit of unity that has arisen since Biden toppled

the filthy, hit-larian dictator, voisted on America by deplorable traders whose name should

be recorded to ensure they're never able to show their faces in public. In that same

spirit of goodwill, the Democrats are now seeking to lay Republican suspicions of electoral

fraud with a sweeping program of reforms that will guarantee no one ever questions their

victories ever again. Since we have a glorious federal system where each individual state

is free to choose its own way of doing whatever Democrats tell them to do, the new reforms

will be applied locally until the entire voting process is so transparent you can't even

see it taking place. For instance, one suggested reform in Chicago is that local gang members

be enlisted to keep order at polling places by driving by them at intervals and in a helpful,

polite way, spraying them with gunfire. Anyone who survives will then be able to freely

cast their vote in whatever way the gang members tell them to. In Philadelphia, the voters

will place their vote in an adorable, receptacle shaped like a minute man. And when the minute

...