Well, it's all over but the shouting, recounting the lawsuits, the riots, the gunplay, the revolution,

nation-laid waste followed by centuries of Mad Max style tribal warfare.

In order to understand what occurred, we have the daily wire have dispatched our crack reporters

and other crack pots to find out what the hell the idiot voters were thinking.

Our crackpot medium, Madame Isabel Uspin-Skaya visited Laurel Hill Cemetery in Philadelphia

to contact the spirit of Joe Biden voter, Clem Searsucker, who died in 1892 when he was

run over by a thresher right after he paused in a field to shout, by gum, I believe I just

invented the iPhone. Madame Uspin-Skaya asked the ghost of Searsucker why he cast his ballot for Biden.

Searsucker said, quote, I'm a corpse who is all but rotted away to nothing with absolutely no

means of comprehending the world around me or even remembering much of what happened to me when I was

alive. So I feel Joe Biden and I have a lot in common. Also, I was damned to hell for all eternity,

so I have a lot in common with Kamala Harris too. Anyway, at this point, it's kind of a tradition since

I've been voting Democrat ever since that thresher ran over me. It's a damn shame too since I just

had this great idea for a new kind of telephone. Unquote. Another proud Biden voter we interviewed was

Hannah Von Schreich, a figment of the imagination, who was brought into being to cast a vote for Biden

in Detroit. Ms. Von Schreich, or possibly Mrs. Von Schreich, it's hard to know since she's

imaginary, said she was drawn to the historic nature of the ticket. Ms. Von Schreich said, quote, Kamala

will be the first corrupt female communist of color to serve as vice president. I thought for sure

it was going to be Ilhan Omar, unquote. The daily wire will continue to bring you the best coverage

of what used to be America. Trigger warning, I'm Andrew Clayvin and this is the Andrew Clayvin Show.

All right, we are back. The vast right wing conspiracy known as Clayvin. What a crappy Clayvin

this weekend. This turned out to be, you know, I just can't hold the world up every day. I've got

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